Ducks in a Row

A few years ago, I simplified my rubber duckies in the bathroom and just left 4 small ones on the window sill in the bathroom. They have been there since. With my children grown at the time, they no longer played with them in the bath. Truth be told they had not played with them for decades but one can hold onto memories for a while. I could not get rid of all of them so kept these 4, well contained on the sill.

My friend, K was visiting and sheepishly came out of the bathroom and said "I don't mean to be cheeky, but you have all your ducks in a row." She probably did not say cheeky, but I heard cheeky.

For the rest of the day, during our conversations we used this expression with each other about our lives. In fact, at this point in time we both have our ducks in a row.

When you are raising kids, working full time, attending school and holding a household together it can feel like the ducks are scattered all across the ponds.

I miss the days of bath time with children in the bath tub with the rubber duckies. These remind me of that time, and they remind me of how wise K is. I will get more when the grandchildren come along.

I count my blessings that, yes "My ducks are in a row!"


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Day 4 and 5 Painting the outside of the Infirmary

When I talked to the volunteer coordinator at the beginning of the week, about what my possible jobs might be, she mentioned painting. That would be fun, I thought. Why is it more fun to do things other places than your own house? Painting at home would be a chore, but painting a beloved building at Star would be fun.

In the first few meals during my volunteer work, I started eating with four other volunteers, Jeanie and Mike, their son Sam and his best friend Ben. Jeanie and Sam ended up on the paint crew. There was a very well intended older volunteer who taught us the "right" way to paint with many, many, many details. Often these details were too much too soon in the process. He also is an extreme perfectionist, and was much too thorough in the job. We ended up taking screen mesh out of the screens, and this was not part of the job. The Pel supervisor intervened during the next shift but not before the damage had been done.

A also talked non stop which gave me an insight as to how others might perceive me. A non stop talker that is, not giving too much details!

Jeanie and I hit it off wonderfully at our first paint shift and we continued to connect for the rest of the week about Star, quilting, parenting etc.

As an aside, for one evening and two afternoons, I ran Myers Briggs workshops for the Pels. Jeanie and her son Sam came to the second one, and her daughter, Sunny, who is a Pel came to one as well. We continued to talk and laugh about Myers Briggs for the rest of the week.

Jeanie took a picture of me painting the infirmary. Every time I return to Star I will walk by that wall and see the smooth strokes of my paint brush.

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Day 2 and 3 - Overcoming Fears

Days 2 and 3 of my volunteer week were interesting to say the least. The Pels have a volunteer coordinator who collects tasks from the various crews.

My first task was to wash the windows along the front of the hotel, the big wooden hotel, whose windows face the pier. They are exposed to the salt air 24/7. As all of their jobs, the Pels have engineered the window washing to be efficient and fun. They also consider resources when they do a job. Rather than using Windex, which apparently does not work with the sea air, they use a couple of squirts of soap and a squeegee. After a few windows a very helpful Pel brought me some sheets of newspaper. This is used to wipe off any of the streaks. Brilliant!! Don't tell Rod that I now do windows though.

While washing the windows, often on a step ladder, I became acquainted with thousands of spiders. BIG GIANT spiders. The first few I backed away from but after a while they became my friend. Except for the poisonous ones, they are pretty harmless, and they do survive by trapping other insects. A Pel went to great extremes to get a spider out of the hotel onto the porch without killing it. This was when I realized I had overcome one fear, or at least lessened it.

My fear of heights also presented itself as I climbed the step ladder to wash the top windows. Again, with each subsequent climb, the knot in my stomach subsided and I was climbing the ladder like a champ.

Day 3 I cleaned all of the glass mantles in the chandeliers in the lobby of the hotel. I had a taller ladder this time, but since I was almost over the fear of heights, it was no problem at all.

I have two fears left, mice and snakes. Mice I think I can overcome, but honestly, snakes are never going to get crossed off the list of fears.
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Day 1 - Volunteering on Star - Chamber

Usually after a week, on Star Island, I have to leave. Saturday morning comes and with tears in my eyes I crawl onto the Thomas Leighton and depart. This year however, since our Star Island Corporation Board retreat will be only 5 days from the end of our conference, I decided to stay and volunteer on the Island for the 5 days in between our conference and the start of the retreat.

Change over day is the busiest day of the week for the Pelicans / aka Pels (the college age youth who work on the Island). I have new appreciation for how hard they work during this day and the extent they go to, ensuring that the Island is ready for the next boat of 260 conferees.

I was assigned to the third floor of Oceanic along with 3 others. From 8:30 am until 3:30 pm, we worked on this one floor. Every bureau and every bed side table made of wood was cleaned with Murphy's Soap, including the inside of the drawers. Beds were made with proper hospital corners (Thanks Mom for teaching me how to make those). The Chamber Pel described how to place the towels, the soap dish, the trash cans and the extra blanket. All are placed consistently in the rooms, to project the image of simplicity and cleanliness.

We took three breaks, where the supervisor checked in with all of us and how we were doing. We did jumping jacks and screamed as loud as we could at the end of our quick meetings.

We were just one very small cog in the wheel of change over, and as I said I have new appreciation for how hard our young adults work to welcome us to our/their Island.

I was exhausted at the end of the day, and since this was not my conference I went to bed early and slept like a log. I have sore muscles from my day on chamber change over that I have not felt for years.

I looked with a new eye at my room when I checked in and inspected the hospital corner and placement of the soap dish.

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4th of July past and present

My concrete memories of the 4th started in VT when I was 10, and we "drove east" to spend the summer on Gardiner Island on Lake Champlain. We moved permanently to VT the next summer. Obviously there were celebrations in Colorado and a picture taken of snow on July 4th in Yampa Colorado, where our ranch was at 8000 feet in the Rockies, but the solid ones were after 10 years of age.

We owned the Island with my Dad's parents and his sister's family and we owned it for about 12 years. Many summer memories were made there.

Daddy LOVED fireworks! We once asked him what his favorite holiday was and he said, "July 4th!"

"More than Thanksgiving?"

"Yup!"

"More than Christmas?"

"Yup!"

"More than your birthday, or father's day?"

"Yup, yup!"

The week before the 4th, Daddy would drive the station wagon over to Jaffrey NH, from the Island, and pick up his order of fireworks. One of us would accompany him. As a kid, I remember the entire back of the car being filled with fireworks. We loaded up the Katy Budgy, our wooden boat that was our transportation to the Island, and moved the stash of fireworks, to the flag pole near the outside grill on the Island. I think they were covered with a tarp until dusk on the 4th.

As dusk was approaching the "army" or in our naval family, the "navy" of kids were put to work. I remember one year my job was to stamp out the embers with a broom, while watching the explosions overhead.

Boats on the Lake started to hear about the Gardiner Island fireworks, and many would come and anchor, and watch them, tooting their horns at the end. Friends and acquaintances from the mainland would write thank you letters for the firework display. My grandfather was an Admiral in the navy, so many letters started with, "Dear Admiral Russell". Daddy did not seem to care that his Dad got the credit. He just loved fireworks, and loved setting them off for others to enjoy.

As I stood with my family watching the fireworks tonight a tear crept into my eye for Daddy. He would have loved the fireworks, and our family games, and the round of golf, and the grilled hamburgers and hot dogs. July 4th is one of my favorite holidays too. It is about summer, and family and food, and games and the wonderment of a fireworks display.

A few of us tonight said as we stood and watched, "it does not get much better than this". It doesn't!


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My thumb injuries and firing my Primary Care Doctor

Wow, how did I forget to let the world know via this blog and FB about my thumb injuries? It could be that this past 2 months have been a flurry of activity. It could be that medical sharing might sound like complaining and who cares anyway?

Two caring individuals (you know who you are) noticed by thumb brace in recently posted FB pictures and asked about the thumb. Multiple people at GA asked me about it.  Here is the update.

In early May, I went to my primary care for painful thumb and tingling in my left leg.

HOLD ON, I must go on this tangent!  She made me wait for 60 minutes. I read 30 magazines in that time, and no one came in to update me.  I was fuming by the time she came in the observation room and yes I did address it with her because she ALWAYS makes me wait at least 30 minutes. I am in the process of firing her for someone who values my time, and at the very least has someone give me updates about the wait time. I understand in our health care situation that PCPs are overworked and only have 15 minutes to try to listen to their patients.  However, I am also firing her because she does not listen to me. I told her I had two things to talk to her about. Gave her the headlines, 1) sore thumb and 2) tingly feeling in my leg.  She failed to talk to me about the tingling in my leg and honestly, I think this is the more worrisome problem. I am seeing a neurologist on Tuesday about that.  I had to say "what about the leg?" as she rose to exit. Obviously the fact that I stood up for myself got her a bit flustered, and her 15 minutes had ended, and she was an hour late already.

I digress! Her diagnosis is that I have arthritis in two of my thumb joints and I have an inflamed tendon which sounds worse by it's official name, De Quervain's tenosynovitis. I left with 4 pages of exercises, and a prescription for PT, after she threatened to go straight to a cortisone shot.  Without trying something else first? My exact words were "We don't do shots without trying other things first!". BTW, I was using the Royal We in case that was not obvious.

She was not going to give me the PT prescription, but I asked if I could have it, just in case the exercises did not work.  She had already said "These probably won't work".  Reasonable request for the PT prescription, and not have to come back to the office?

This post did not start out as a rant, but has become that.  Thanks to all who have asked about the thumb, including perfect strangers at GA and to the two caring individuals on FB who noticed.  Updates to follow. 

Anybody want to help me solve world hunger, right after we improve the medical situation in this country?

Don't go to the noise, let it come to you

A few weeks ago, during a yoga class, there was a screaming baby just outside for the entire 90 minutes. I complained to the YMCA, and they made efforts to resolve the issue.

When I talked to my teacher about it, she explained an attitude and technique that is wonderful, and that I have used several times since.

Briefly it is, rather than "going" to the noise, let it come to you, and then figure out what to do with it. When there are noises during yoga now, I have tried this and it really works. I don't want to go out and tell them to be quiet anymore, I just move on.

This is a big one! When Murg/Rod snores now, I imagine that the sounds are like a wave flowing over me, and I fall asleep rather than get irritated. Ask him! I have not poked him to stop snoring in 3 weeks.

Yesterday during our business meeting of the Unitarian Universalist Association, a group of church members put up flags so their members could find the seats and so they could all sit together. The flags were in my direct line of sight to the stage. Should I move? Should I ask them to lower them? Instead they became a frame for me to look through, and assuming positive intent, I was no longer irritated with these perfect strangers.

I obviously won't catch myself and reframe my attitude every time, but so far this is working for me. Don't go to the noise, let it come to you!