CHANGES - Impulsive or maybe not - we have been moving in this direction for a while

For the casual observer our activities of the last month might appear to be impulsive or manic.  I am not going to list the activities, you can see that on my Facebook page so instead, I am sharing the sequence of events.  AND we may appear to be excited and happy on our Facebook posts.  We are also very very sad to be leaving our town and faith community of 23 years!  Believe me, this move is bittersweet!  It is very hard to think of leaving the house and town where we raised our two children.  There is a lot of love in this house, and we have the memories as we pack up the moving boxes. Here is what Bethany said on Facebook:

In case anyone ever questioned where I get my Do All The BIG Things At Once attitude from, my parents have decided to put their house on the market 8 days before their daughter gets married. Oh, and family is coming to stay for two weeks starting tomorrow. Go Big or Go Home just became Go Big And Sell Your Home. 

On a related note, know anyone looking to buy in Lexington, MA? Perfect house for a family with live-in in-laws. The MLS will tell you all about that. 

But the MLS ttotally missed the real perks: It's on a lot that's perfect for running off the legs of Labrador Retrievers. On a quiet street with a roller coaster hill. 10 minute walk to The Center, which means that during Nor'easters, you can walk to town in your snow suit and be the only family in the restaurant or coffee shop. And, it's been blessed over and over with a whole lot of love (the inside, not the "gardens").

BONUS: Rainbow bedroom that happened when certain parents told a certain 8 year old she could paint it whatever color(s) she wanted, complete with GIRL POWER light switch cover (inspired by the Spice Girls, of course).

— with Rodney Lowe and Sally Russell.
For 8-10 years, since Bethany graduated from high school, I have felt that this house is about double the space that we need in terms of rooms.  That and some heavy heavy winters have caused us to look at townhouses and condos in the Boston area.  We made an offer on one downtown Lexington right before Christmas 2 years ago.  Thankfully we did not get that one, although we were disappointed at the time.  We looked in Woburn, Burlington, Waltham, Arlington, Cambridge, etc.  We always came back to, we love the location of our house, it is one level, and close to downtown and our faith community, First Parish in Lexington.

Things changed this July when we decided to resign our membership from First Parish Lexington and go on a pilgrimage to find a church.  If anyone wants to talk about that decision please contact me and we can have coffee.

We both said, let's look for a UU church in the Boston area and if we don't find what we are looking for, we can come back to First Parish.  In the meantime, we started looking again actively with Bill Scott, who is fabulous by the way!  He showed us some in Cambridge and Somerville about 6 months ago, and he started to get a good sense of what we liked.

The beginning of August we received a letter in the mail from what ended up being our realtor, Joan Skomurski,  who is also terrific, asking AGAIN, if we are interested in selling our house.  I really did not want it to be a tear down, and after viewing our house, she did not feel it would be.  So that day we decided to list it and try to catch the last wave of parents looking for an excellent school system.  People move from India and China for our school system!

Incidentally that was 3 days before our daughter's wedding, and 5 of Rod's English family were visiting.  Our intent was to be vagabonds for a year, and we could always live in Vermont at Coniston.  We looked at a 2200 square foot warehouse in Cambridge, which would have been very complicated.  Our offer was rejected on that one, thankfully.

Right after Bryan and Bethany's wedding and right before we travelled to Colorado for another wedding Bill called and said "I know you are going to Colorado later today, but you have to come see this condo.  It is in final offer stage, and we will have to make an offer today!"  I looked online and knew it was one we would fall in love with.

Needless to say it is just what we have been looking for in terms of openness, loftiness, balcony and close to Boston.  Bethany has gotten us comfortable with the Union Square section of Somerville by living there for almost 2 years with Bryan and their two cats.

So the unit is a 2 minute walk from the extension to the Green Line due to open in 2017, the Washington St station, and from our patio we can see the Boston skyline.  We hope to stay in touch with our Lexington and First Parish friends, after all we are only a 30 minute drive away, there is a great view of Boston, and the loft will be great for entertaining.

I am an open book and make the offer again, to anyone who wants to talk about this, to have coffee.  Be wary of a too caffeinated Sally though!

MOVING - Want anything? Yours with a modest donation to WATCH

Friends, as you might have heard we have a purchase and sale on our Lexington home of 23 years, and are moving to a 1 bedroom condo in Somerville at 60 Tufts St #17.  This is a lot of changes in a few short weeks AND we are very excited.

For local peeps, we are running a virtual yard sale.  We have some BIG items we would like to pass on to friends, rather than strangers / free cycle or Craigslist.  We have already sold our roof rake to dear friends and they got a bargain for this next winter if you believe the Farmer's Almanac.

SO here is what we have available.  We don't want to make any money, rather we ask that you make a donation to WATCH which is a non-profit in a neighboring town, Waltham, that both Rodney and I support through barn raising activities and tutoring a Guatemalan woman who has become a friend.    Below are pictures of the items:

Here is how it will work.  Call or email me which item you would like.  We can discuss a donation amount, you can ask any questions and we settle on a deal.  I will note in the comment area below which items are taken.  First come, first settle on a deal and pick up item!  Leave a comment below if you do not have my cell phone or email and I will get in touch with you!

Wooden desk, painted orange, good for child or teen

small TV with built in VHS player

Plastic carrier box for top of car 

Computer desk and book shelves

Second side of computer desk

Electric oil filled space heater

2 fluorescent reading floor lamps -

HD TV

The Mini was stolen

If anyone has been following our lives on Facebook for the last month it has been very very very full.  I cannot tell you for sure but I think today we reached the brink of craziness.

We were called by our real estate agent at 12:30 that there was a loft unit in Somerville we needed to see. I was bathing in anticipation of our 3pm departure to the airport with our nephew,for his trip back home to Newcastle and our trip to Colorado for a wedding.

Yes, we told him we can get there by 1:15 to see the unit.  We made it by 1:20, spent 20 minutes walking the unit asking quite a few questions, etc.  When the listing agent left, we asked what we would need to get the unit.  He guided us to an offer, we electronically signed it and drove to get a drink to quench our thirst in Winchester on our way home.

I parked right in front of an ice cream shop (this is important to the story) and we walked around the corner to a Starbucks. 20 minutes later at 2:40, we walked out of Starbucks and walked across the street.  Both of us panicked because the Mini was not in front of the Ice Cream shop. There was a fire hydrant and I was pretty sure I had not parked in front of it, but what other reason could there be for its absence?  Someone stole the Mini!

I ordered an Uber to drive me home to get Spencer to drive him to the airport and Rod called 911 and talked to the Winchester Police department.  He described what he was wearing so they would recognize him when they drove us and I waited for the Uber.  At the exact same time we said to each other "This is where we parked the car right?"  In that split second I remembered walking around the corner to Starbucks, versus parking right across the street. I hurried to the adjacent street and indeed there was the Mini, in front of THAT ice cream shop.  We cleared it up with the police, or rather they accompanied Rod to the car and looked at his license and the registration.  I cancelled the Uber and we got in the Mini.

We both laughed all the way home, at ourselves, at our level of stress and the situation. This is why we belong together and why we have stayed together for 28+ years of marriage. So this caused us to slow down a bit and be ready to get to the airport, sign more documents electronically, run reports to prove funds, photocopy a check and wait to hear that we got the unit, which happened exactly 5 hours later at 5:45.  This day will always be known as "The day the Mini was stolen".

My tactic for visiting Art Museums - MFA yesterday

One aspect of being retired is that we are able to visit more art museums.  We belong to the ICA in Boston and the MFA.  Contrary to what my English brother-in-law says, there is wonderful art at the ICA, go visit it.

When Bethany was 7 or 8 and Christopher was 16 or 17, we visited my brother George and his wife Judy in Paris over Christmas.  We visited the Louvre one day and Christopher asked if he could go back for a second day which he did by himself.  I had achieved success with him for having brought him to museums at an early age.

I took Bethany to the Musée D'Orsay one day by ourselves.  It is not always so obvious to a 7 or 8 year old why anyone would visit an art museum, but my Mom took us at a young age and I credit that with my love of museums now.  Bethany was asking if we could go back to the apartment after the second salon.  "Oh, boy this is going to be a long day!" I thought to myself.  I had taken her here to give George and Judy a break from company for a few hours.

In a last minute ditch effort to get to see some more art myself I said to her as we entered the next salon "Find your favorite picture in this salon."  She came back 30 seconds later with her favorite one.  I thought it would take a bit longer than 30 seconds, but hey, that bought me a bit of time to look at a few pictures.  I continued this in the next few salons and then said, "OK, now find the ugliest picture in this next salon."  This diversionary tactic bought me 30 more minutes before this very tolerant 7 year old decided she had had enough.

As a follow up to this story, when she was 15, she gave me an art book of all of the paintings of the Musée D'Orsay.  SUCCESS!

What I realized yesterday as we visited the MFA for 45 minutes before we headed off to Fenway, is that this is how I visit art museums.  I walk into a room, glance around and walk over to the picture which captures my eye.  The pictures in this post are what caught my eye yesterday in my 45 minutes.

As an aside, Bethany does not have a very good sense of direction.  When we ask her which way to go, we usually go the opposite way.  After we left the Musée D'Orsay, in an effort to buy more time away from the apartment so George and Judy could get some more quiet time I said "OK, you get us back to the apartment."  She went straight back the fastest way possible, for the first time in her life.  At 26 she is still this determined when she wants to be, and she loves art galleries.  

Donating leftover wedding food to the Homeless Shelter in Waltham

OK, been gone for a pretty long time from posting blogs.  Mostly because Facebook has become my venue for sharing my life.  Today while driving back from Bristol Lodge in Waltham I decided that I want to get back to blogging.

The wedding of the year was held at Friendly Crossways over this past weekend.  That will be the topic of another blog post.  We had quite a bit of food leftover that we transported back in 4 of our cars and 3 others dropped stuff by our house.

I am in general a very thrifty person so I sat and tried to figure out what I could return to stores.  I did return some things to Wegman's and did not realize that they could not use some of the things again.  It broke my heart to watch them pour a gallon of orange juice down the drain.  I learned my lesson there.  I may have gotten some money back because Wegman's has such good customer service, but the waste was discouraging.  I may approach Wegman's to change this rule and at least donate it to some needy place that would take it.

At First Parish in Lexington we often take leftover food to a homeless shelter called Bristol Lodge in Waltham.  I loaded up dozens of bagels, full boxes of snacks, cream cheeses, plastic cups, and a bag of 20 oranges.  As I climbed down the stairs to the shelter, I was greeted very warmly by the man in charge, Tony.  I asked if he would take these items, and he jumped at the opportunity.  By the time I returned to my car to get the rest of the items, there were two men already waiting to help me carry things down the stairs.  Curtis and John, I think are homeless men who help out at the shelter.  Tony was so personable, friendly, welcoming and in the end we talked for a few minutes about my daughter's wedding.

It was so heart warming to see the space they were creating for men down on their luck.  I asked if I could make a big pot of soup and bring it over and he said yes.  I asked him what were the times that he really needs help and it is at 5pm in the afternoon when men start arriving.  I cannot help tomorrow, but I will be there starting next week on a regular basis.  I am taking 3 dozen eggs we have leftover from the wedding over tomorrow and the unused chocolate bars from the s'mores adventure.  I was reluctant to bring some things today since I was unsure about what they take, because of the Wegman's experience.

Coming back from the UU General Assembly I was determined to get more active and not just talk about social action and justice.  Bristol Lodge will be on my calendar on a regular basis.

If you have extra food from events, they accept donations of all kinds from 2:30-4:30 every afternoon.  They also could use help to serve at 5pm, and Tony said the hardest thing to do is keep the kitchen clean so I would imagine they could use help cleaning up.  Anybody want to join me throwing some energy at Bristol Lodge?  Let me know!

Uber - very interesting experience

We are staying at the Logan Hilton overnight since we are leaving so early in the morning so we decided to take a cab to Alewife MBTA station.  We need to take a cab since no busses run to Lexington on Saturdays (a topic for another blog post).  Rod called two cab companies and neither had a cab to send out to us.  Really????  One said they could send one in 30 minutes which was tolerable but then called us back to say they did not have a cab for us.

We had used Uber when we were in London in June.  Our friends Andy and Miriam use these services all of the time and I had loaded the app onto my iPhone out of curiosity but had never used it.  I got onto Uber and requested a cab.  Someone would arrive in 6 minutes, which was just about how much time it would take us to get ready.  The app showed us a picture of the driver, the kind of car he drives and we could look on a map to see where he was as he approached our house.

In the end we took the cab all the way to the airport hotel for $30, rather than switching to the MBTA.  This is a lot less than half of what a cab would cost.  I don't think this is a perfect situation, but Uber is definitely going to shake up the cab industry and I for one am only going to use Uber from now on because of the convenience and because of their business model.  We talked a lot to the driver on the way to the airport.  He used to drive in Norwood and has worked for Uber for 1 month.  He is convinced that Uber will win the current legal battle in Boston.

I understand that there is tension in this industry between the traditional cab companies and Uber, but believe me, if I cannot get a cab at all in Lexington and I don't really have another option, this is how I have to get somewhere without a cab and on a day when the busses are not running.  I am often an early adopter of technology so for now on I will adopt this new business model, until I get burned or hurt somehow.

"Please don't tell me what to do!"

On one of the early days of our Morocco trip, this was uttered by one of the participants (name withheld intentionally).  This is such a complicated dynamic and I have thought about it, and examined it almost daily since then.

We all have expertise and knowledge that we like to share with others.  Remember back to second grade when the teacher asked a question and hands shot up waiting to be called upon.  We were rewarded back then for having knowledge and the correct answer.  

So this sharing of knowledge is a good thing right? especially as some of us start forgetting things.  It is nice to have someone around who can remember the name that you cannot remember.  Or that place, or that person.

I want to come clean and just say that I do not like to be told what to do.  I already have a mother, and don't need another one, thank you very much.  So often the telling comes across as parent to child and protecting.  I don't need to be protected, although sometimes I do need to be warned about the pot hole I am about to step in.  

I think another reason I react to the sharing of knowledge is that I do not learn by lecture or by reading.  I learn by doing and talking about it, so when someone "shares" their knowledge I view it as a lecture and immediately glaze over and check out of the conversation.  

I know that almost all of the time, this sharing is done to be helpful, and has a positive intent.  In the last 6 weeks, and even during the Morocco trip, I was able to reframe the words and say "This person is just trying to be helpful and share all they know."  It is not because they are being a know-it-all or a show off, but they really are trying to be helpful.  This helped/helps so much to reframe their intent.

I will still react with the "Don't tell me what to do." and if I can catch myself I might be able to reframe it and not feel like the child in the classroom lecture.  The wonderful thing about being human is that if we choose to, we can learn about ourselves every single day.  AND we can reframe and hear things differently, if we catch ourselves and let ourselves.  It is a great day to be alive!