Leadership philosophy that has stuck with me

At breakfast with S this morning, we were talking about leadership training. On the 30 second drive back from that breakfast, I reflected on what has stuck with me for leadership concepts. I have taught a lot of these over the years, but when it comes down to it, only a few remain a part of my own philosophy.

The first one that I spout about all the time is one from Alfie Cohn. He believes that testing kids in school is stupid because you are testing them mid learning cycle. Not all kids learn at the same pace, so the test is mid-way for most of the class. Standardized tests are the same thing. I always told my kids that they were obsolete as soon as you 1) got into college 2) finished that class. Translated to the work environment with a Deming quality concept thrown in, you cannot distinguish performance for 85% of the population. So why do we spend so much time on merit increases, when you cannot distinguish the difference in performance? Pet peeve of mine for sure.

My most recent learning was about brain chemistry, the partial topic of a previous post. I must have used this concept to explain changing behavior, 100 times since that February workshop, as recently as yesterday in fact.

This is the obvious one, MBTI. I revisited a worksheet yesterday and these two comments about my personality jumped out from the page like cold water on my face to remind me of some opportunities for enlightenment: ENFP Stress Behavior - Keeps talking until you FEEL the same way as he/she does AND ENFP Resists Rules by - Relying on the force of personality to overcome laws of physics. I learn something every time I conduct a MBTI workshop. I use it daily to interact better with family and friends and workmates. I laugh at myself daily about my type.

The last one for this post is the book Now Discover Your Strengths by Marcus Buckingham. The best thing to do, is to focus on people's strengths and not try to fix their weaknesses. This one is so obvious, however, we are in the middle of performance reviews at work, and I am not sure our system is geared to focus on strengths as much as it is to have "developmental" opportunities.

OK, those 4 are the top of mind for me, today and many of them have been on my radar and in my daily language for at least a decade.

Keeping the fingers busy knitting

At our covenant group on Sunday our topic was relaxation. Sitting under a huge tree in the shade just outside the church in Burlington Vt was pretty relaxing until the band on Church St starting playing. Next time we are going to the Lake, waterfront to meet.

I realized during this meeting that I knit so I can concentrate. When I am knitting, I am relaxed. Rarely, are my fingers clenched when I am knitting.

I also realized that meditation is not meditative for me. It is stressful to stay absolutely quiet (the extrovert that I am). Yoga is meditative because I am doing something, but meditation is not. Someone at Star said "You should meditate"! "Nope, I shouldn't, unless I want to get more stressed." It probably works for some but not for me.

Give me a ball of yarn, some wooden needles and almost any situation, and I am relaxed. There is something that is so familiar about creating those stitches, and having something for my idle fingers to focus on which causes me to concentrate and to relax.

One member of our group talked about Genesis and the 7th day of Sabbath. We need to rest and relax. Knitting is that for me.

The ONLY bad thing about Star is . . .

The only bad thing about Star is the showers. They are few and far between and this week, there was just a trickle from the nozzle, not really enough to rinse. There were 3 of them, but none were satisfying.

I asked a lot of people at Star this week, "Why do you come? What brings you back? What first brought you?"

Many respondents said it was the people. The natural beauty was also mentioned a few times.

I pondered it myself this week, Why do I keep coming back? It is the people and the traditions. Where else can you spend an entire social hour talking about names of couples and whose name do you say first e.g. Bonnie and Clyde or Sally and Rodney. We came up with some hypotheses, but no conclusions. It was a silly conversation.

As I sat on East Rock last night at 12 midnight with about 30 others, I realized this is why I come back. Simple entertainment, the wonder of the world, laid out before your eyes, ears and nose. The fog horn on White Island and the sea gulls. Singing folk songs until you cannot keep your eyes open and falling into bed to the sounds of the teens on their last night staying up for the sun rise.

This is why I come back: the rocking chairs, lime rickeys, silly conversations, deep conversations, the tears, the laughter, early morning coffee, 10pm chapel, walking up the hill in silence carrying a lantern, the din of the dining hall, children's artwork, adult artwork, the 269 other shoalers, the silliness, the healing conversations, sharing, catching up on last year, planning other visits, soaking in the sunlight on the front porch and the LACK of: TV, news, cars, outside world

It is a shock to the system to be back on the mainland. As I sit at Coniston in my daze I have mentioned to a few people that it is like being jet lagged only star lagged.

After the first great shower in a week, I feel clean again, and touched again by the magic and spiritual aspect of Star.

It has been a wonderful few weeks, punctuated by my annual visit to Star. Back to work refreshed, and healed, and recharged.

It is Raining again!!!!

Ok, I am sort of getting it, that people are sick of the rain. It is 8:48 in the morning and it looks like twilight. I guess it is a good thing I had some sun in Salt Lake City, and I sure would not want to be on Star Island in this weather.

So my crankiness yesterday is partially explained by too much travel, too many things going on and not enough sleep in my own bed. Granted, these are all things I asked for, quilting, General Assembly and most importantly Star, BUT I have not even unpacked my bags from Vermont Quilt Festival and certainly have not even looked at GA materials. The pile is building in the corner of my bedroom.

Murg was clearing out his pile last night, but I fell asleep, which was really needed.

So as I grab an umbrella to go out with E on her last day at Intuit, I will miss her, I think maybe the rain is also affecting me. Please get it out of your system before our Star week. It does not look hopeful. Pack lots of warm clothes and jeans, not t-shirts and shorts. The last few years at Star, I have not even put on my long pants. A different year this year, I suppose. Just like you can never have a bad weekend, you can never have anything but a glorious week on Star.

this is my life some days, now I am laughing about it

Today I had a hair cut at noon, and had 2 errands to do, one post and one pre. The pre one was the preferred one, so I headed south only to discover the yarn shop does not open until noon and it was 11:35. So off to the dentist to get the darn receipt that my Health Spending Account admin desires.

On the trip, EVERY light turned yellow or red right before I got there and EVERY road had granny drivers or cement trucks in front of me. Because I had a noon deadline, there were so many obstacles.

I don't have PMS these days, coz I am far beyond that, but honestly I think I still have the hormonal swings associated with PMS. I feel irritable, and grouchy and grumpy. Halfway through the errands, I stopped blaming things that were beyond my control and calmed down.

As usual, I was trying to pack too much into my window of opportunity, and some days it works, some days it does not.

My hair got cut, AND I got back for the going away cake for someone leaving work.

Yarn store awaits another free block of time . . .

Blogging live from General Assembly - NOT

OK, it is has been a long 4 days and lot has happened. Democracy in action, a couple of close votes, which actually had to be counted and a group of over 1200 was split by only 13 votes. YIKES.

We had two candidates for presidency of our Denomination, and there are 1/2 of the participants very happy, and the other 1/2 sad and disappointed END OF TRYING TO LIVE BLOG

So, I tried to live blog but instead had to do my REAL job of reporting on the Plenary session.

We had many more responsive resolutions this year, than I ever remember. The pot was stirred around our by-laws and being able to change certain sections of them. UUs love to weigh in when they don't feel heard and that certainly happened.

I was commenting last night that this year General Assembly was different because 1) there was an election with 2 strong candidates 2) the Statement of Conscience on Peacemaking did not pass, and was sent back to be re-written 3) there was a very close vote, split by 13 or 17 votes, but a very small number, on the by-law amendment.

This left many people sad and disappointed, and other happy and elated, but all in all, that is what democracy is all about.

Tired and happy to have gone to GA

Rain, what Rain?

Honestly, and I am not in denial, I don't notice the weather. I guess this is a good thing in the middle of the winter or mud season at Coniston.

While in VT at VQF, it was only drizzily one day, but reading Facebook updates from my Beantown friends, there was a lot of grousing about the weather.

Maybe it is my old age, but "It is what it is!" I definitely cannot control this one.

I don't think twice about walking in the rain, and only take an umbrella if it is teeming down (Gordie term, and one my husband's family uses in torrential rain.)

I did not even notice that June has been wet, and that the sun has not been out.

Call me crazy, but with things like Iran to think about, and on my way to General Assembly, the weather is a hang nail that can be cut off.

I often pause when someone complains about the weather, because honestly, I have not noticed.

Sally being Sally!