Getting Stuck on a Quilting project

For a variety of reasons, I get stuck on a project.  Right now I am stuck because the piece of fabric I bought for the border is too dark of a teal color.  I could charge ahead and install that piece but it would ruin the flow of the piece, so I am waiting.  The quilt is lying on my design "wall", aka the floor of my sewing room.  I want to leave it out so that I don't forget to finish it and so that I am sure to buy the right color teal the next time.

While I sorted my fabric yesterday, I also put a few piles of fabric down, with the pattern on top for my next few projects.  They are not stuck, they are just not started yet.

Truth be told, some of my works in progress are not really stuck, they are just stalled in that phase of production, and sometimes are too low in the pile to actually see them.  When I sort my fabric I happen upon these little surprised, "Oh, I remember that project, I wonder if I have the pattern?, and I wonder if I know what I am doing next?, and I wonder if I really ever want to finish this one?"

I actually am being patient with myself in this stuckness.  If I plunge ahead, I will put in the wrong piece and will be upset with myself.  If I wait long enough the right piece will emerge from the universe.

For now, I walk into my sewing room and there are piles of projects laid out, and works in progress lying in the design "wall".

Oh the fun of being a textile artist, and of having the right space in which to have chaos that sometimes get converted into order.

Read The Hobbit

"Read the Hobbit" has become a shortcut phrase in our house.  I cannot remember when it started but Chris was young, maybe 8.  One of us was looking for a book to read and Rod said "Read the Hobbit".  I think both Chris and I had started the book earlier than this first episode, but did not get into it, so our experience was not such a positive one at the time.

Any time after that, when the three of us would ask for a book to read, Rod replied "Read the Hobbit".  By this time, out of obstinance we were not going to pick it up.  It was sad that a book that was so dear to Rod was dismissed by the three of us.  I think he is still trying to get us to read it.

So, the topic of seeing the movie comes up, and I think I want to see it.  The dilemna is, will seeing the movie wreck the book for me which is what lots of movies do to perfectly well written books.  On the off chance that some day I do read it, should I wait to see the movie until that day.

Lots of people will think me crazy for my reaction to reading The Hobbit. That is OK.

So, we venture out in the snow later today to see the movie, and maybe, just maybe I will be inspired after having it pushed on me for 27 years to actually read the book.

2012 Christmas Letter- Year in Review

2012 was a year where we were very consciously counting our blessings. You, our friends are many of them.

The first part of the year was a blur.  I do remember that we had a HUGE decision looming.  If Rod's job with Fidelity got moved to Raleigh-Durham, NC, would we move with it?  We both said, we can live anywhere for 2 years, so when the announcement was made in March, we were pretty gung-ho.  When Rod finally got his  paperwork, the deal to follow his job to NC was about the same as the deal to stay until September 2013, and then leave Fidelity with a nice retention bonus and severance package.  The latter is what he is doing.  The big project of 7 years was installed two weekends ago, and he will wrap up and transfer his knowledge of almost 25 years to others who are staying. He doesn't know what the future will hold after September next year but he's not yet comfortable using the word 'retirement' to describe it.

Rod in front of Fidelity NC - down 30 lbs

We spent a nice weekend in NC, at a beautiful resort, fed well by Fidelity and explored some housing.  We even attended the UU Church in Raleigh and liked the feel of that.  We count our blessings to have had options.

Early in the year Rodney got serious about his health and became a 5 day a week regular at the local 'Y' eventually getting up to about 20 miles a week on the treadmill there. His weight was down about 30 lbs by the time he blew his Achilles' tendon over the July 4th week because Sally was away and he felt he could push his limits. The Achilles is almost back in shape now and thankfully the ellipticals at the 'Y' allowed him to get my exercise fix and keep the weight down. Next year the plan is to drop another 30lbs. Our health is a significant blessing and Rodney is trying not to ignore that.

In June, for our 25th wedding anniversary (one of our biggest blessings) we traveled a few days early to our denomination's Annual General Assembly in Phoenix and went up to the Grand Canyon.  OMG, I will never forget the view as we walked around a bend in the path, of the immense view across the Canyon.  We had a nice visit there and did some sight seeing in Phoenix before our business meeting started. The Canyon and Sedona are places we will definitely visit more in the future.   We would NEVER live in Phoenix.  Too damn hot.  We attended a baseball game that was 86 degrees inside while it was 117 degrees outside.



That is the Colorado River

For Sally the  most impactful part of our meeting was a vigil attended by 3000 other Unitarian Universalists at night at Joe Arpaio's Tent City.  Google him if his name is not familiar.  We were warned that there would be counter protesters, who would legally be carrying guns, which with the recent elementary shooting, makes me even more nervous.  This theme of immigration rights flows through the year for Sally as she does her small little part to try to change our broken immigration policies. Rodney participated in a volunteer opportunity to help resident aliens prepare their application for Citizenship - something he was doing himself a few short years ago. In the end,  even though we had hundreds of people lined up for hours before the work began we had such an amazing response from the UU's at GA that we had more volunteers than were needed.

Sisters in DC

Family, represents so many of our blessings. A Sisters visit in September caused us to take a road trip to Philly and DC.  We stayed two blocks from the Capitol and walked a dozen miles each day seeing all the free museums along the mall.  We were impacted by the new memorials since we were in DC 19 years ago.  Where does the time go?  We had dinner one night with Sally's cousin Kit, who the Sisters had met two years prior at Chris and Meg's wedding.



NYC Girls Weekend

NYC visits were plentiful in the fall, with joys and sorrows celebrated.  A dear friend's memorial service was held in late September at All Souls Church.  Two weeks later we met in Brooklyn/Manhattan for Sister-in-Law Judy's BIG birthday.  Brother George surprised her with all of her three siblings and spouses.  The next week Sally had a Star girls weekend in NYC, and escaped the city by bus right before Hurricane Sandy arrived.

Life Size Settlers

Singing at Thanksgiving, words on ceiling

Visits to VT and Coniston are still frequent, and always include a family gathering.  In fact, we drive on Christmas day to Vermont where George and Judy are entertaining the entire family for dinner.  For Thanksgiving, Mike and Peg did the same at their house in VT.  Our lawn in Vermont was the second installation of a life size Settlers of Catan game.  With the help of fertilizer, the game board is permanently in the front lawn.



Two generations

Chamber Crew on Star with Amy

Other life events, Chris and Meg bought their first house in Essex Junction VT after living at our house in VT for 10 months.  They also traveled with George and Judy and Mom and Charlie to Alaska.  It was a very special three generation trip. 


Bethany started Divinity school part time, switched jobs to the Director of Social Action at the Concord MA UU church and she, her boy friend Bryan and Shakes the wondercat, moved into a cute third floor apartment in Watertown Square. 




Sally continues to fill her time with volunteer works, tutoring, hospice  and now immigrant rights.  She has done a little bit of paid work this year and will probably continue some executive coaching, when it can fit into her schedule.  She had two injuries this year.  Tripping up the patio steps in July caused a very dramatic knee injury and falling down the same steps in November broke her wrist.  She now has a piece of metal in her wrist holding her radial bone together.

Distant Cousin Linda who joined us on Star this year

She continues to serve on the Board of Star Island Corporation and traveled four times to the Island this year. 2 Board meetings and our regular week the second week of July.  A distant cousin, Linda, joined us on Star this year and it was great to reconnect.  In August, Sally worked as a volunteer on Star in the chamber crew with her friend Amy.  We make a mean hospital corner and boy can we bleach a toilet!  We were also at least 30 years older than the college ago kids who helped us to learn the job.  And the sunsets were magnificent.

This Rodney joined the board of Communities Without Borders which is the group who organised the trip he and Bethany took to Zambia in 2005. It now supports almost 1,000 children orphaned by the AIDS epidemic. If you want to see more go visit communitieswithoutborders.org to see what we do.

As we continue to count our own blessings our hearts go out to others less fortunate. This year mental health seems to have woven it's way into our lives. The psychotic who Rodney and others had to hold down for an hour on a boat ride out to Star Island, suicides of colleagues and friends family members, and of course the current horrors in Sandy Hook at the school a young adult friend of ours attended as a child.

Every year as we sit down to write our letter/blog post, there seems to be something happening in the world that is unfathomable and this year is no exception.  Newtown, Portland, Syria, Aurora, gun control to name a few.  We were happy with the Nov 6th results but realize that almost half of the voters in the US, were not happy.  Our hope and prayer for 2013 is to work together and be kind to each other. Our blessings are many, we hope yours will be also in 2013.



I wait for Santa and the arrival of the Oranges

Today's boxes

This time of year, there is a lot of waiting, patiently, for people to arrive and things to happen.  Almost since I left the family home, I have been receiving oranges from Florida at this time of year.  The boxes on the step are always a surprise though.  I did not know I was waiting for them, until I opened the door just now and saw this.

My grandmother always sent us a big box, and in fact, we store our Christmas decorations in those boxes, which are very strong BTW.  Living in New England, the arrival of citrus from Florida is so wonderful, and I feel like a queen until we make our way through that box.


Mom took over sending the box when Mama died in 1993, and I don't realize it but I am patiently awaiting their arrival.  It is a big part of our traditions this time of year, and I always remember Mama when they arrive.  The only senile thing she did was call Rodney, Roger.  One of our boxes came to Mr. and Mrs. Roger Lowe.  I loved her for this tiny flaw, and we still have the label on one of those older boxes.



Older boxes are from Mama

So as we proceed into the darkest time of the year, and continue to wait patiently for things to happen, we are blessed with sunshine and love of family, from Florida





Hospice miracles of the season

One of the patients who I have been visiting for several months is usually sleeping.  She sometimes acknowledges me when I sit down.  For most of our sessions she is sleeping or resting.

Today when I arrived one of her sons was playing the harmonica for her, while continually holding her hand.  It was so precious.  After some of the songs, even though her eyes were still closed, she mouthed "Thanks for that song".  This was the first time I have met any of her family.  After he was done with his repertoire, I suggested some Christmas Carols, which he then launched into.

After one of these, she opened her eyes, and said "I really liked that song."

As he was about to leave, and while he was saying goodbye, she put her hands on either side of his face and spoke his name several times.  It was so touching.  Often you are not sure if patients even know you are there.  In fact, they are more aware of your presence than we know.

I pondered what it must be like to not remember a familiar face, and then to switch into knowing that person intimately.  I speculated that maybe she knew him for the harmonica music he played when she was younger and more alert.  For that split second she knew exactly who he was, and that he had just played beautiful music.

For 15 minutes after he had left, when she did open her eyes she called out his name.  I replied that he had just left but that while he was there he played some awesome music.

I left her listening to her Christian prayers, which obviously gave her lots of comfort.  She even felt her non existent rosary beads during one of the prayers.  Those traditions and rituals are very important reminders of faith, especially when parts of our memory have left us.

I think I saw several miracles during my visit today.

Cannot quite process this latest shooting

I cannot quite process a shooting in a kindergarten class, and yet I have to watch the news for updates.  It is not the same at all, but this is the way I felt watching 911.  This is a different time, because when I logged into Facebook just now, many of my friends have commented about the shootings, and a dear friend used to live in this town.  Even though I am sitting at home alone, I feel connected to them as I process this latest horrible news.

I have to believe that we have two big issues here, gun control and mental health.  Gun control is legislative.  Mental Health is so complex.  There is so much we just don't know about the brain and what could cause anyone to shoot a kindergartner.

I wonder if the news media did not cover things like this 24/7, if there would be less of it?

For some people the only way to get your minute of fame is to do something like this.  I remember feeling that way when the attempt was made on Reagan's life.

My inclination is to grab my loved ones and crawl into a cave somewhere.  I am doing the next best thing by retreating to Vermont/Coniston with a lot of my family and friends for the weekend.

As Ellen DeGeneres says at the end of each show "Be kind to one another".