Gratitude - our latest covenant group topic

On Wednesday our covenant group discussed gratitude. Believe it or not, on first blush it is a very upbeat topic but the group was very pensive and quiet and thoughtful for most of the session.

We asked everyone to think about one thing that they are extremey grateful for and mine was "I am grateful that I allow myself to be me." This does not sound very high priestesslike but for me it has been a challenge. One of the downfalls of my Colors, is that I take care of others' needs and often forget to take care of myself. My most recent boss said at my mid-year review "I want you to show more of you. I want you to be you as much as you can." WOW!!! Was I being other than myself? Yes, I was.

Since I am in HR, I have to be guarded at times. I cannot swear like a trooper, tell off color jokes, show favoritism, or be inappropriate at all. This is a constraint. Also, since I guide managers through difficult conversations with their employee, there is also a pocket of people who I have coached through difficult times. What would they think if 5 minutes later I am laughing my head off. OK, what does that matter? Yes, that is the point, what does that matter, BE YOURSELF.

I am trying this out at work. I was a lot more animated and playful this week. That is me. A lot more energetic and a lot more laughing came out of this body this week and that is me. I was questioned about how much coffee I had this morning, because the real sally showed up. I was asked what was different.

Get used to it guys and gals, Sarah the 7th generation of them, aka the High Priestess has come out of her shell (OMG, was I in a shell, that has never been the case) rephrased - is trying to be as genuine and authentic as possible without losing her job as a great HR person.

Obviously I am not going to be giggling through a conversation where someone is about to be told they need to find another job, but I will join the playful activity of nerf gun attacks and the very playful activity that occured in the kitchenette this week: first person drew a "plan on a plate" second person "plate on a plan" third person "paper on a plate on a plan" fourth person "napkin on a paper on a plate on a plan".

So, I am grateful that I allow myself to be me, and there is a long list of other things that I am grateful for, every day, every hour, every minute. Stopping to reflect on gratitude was a great topic for us.

Colors and High Priestess

So, at Intuit, rather than MBTI, we use a personality profile called Colors. It was developed by David Belle-Isle who used to work for Intuit. Even though I have been at Intuit for 3 years, and have tried many times to be a part of Colors it did not happen until last week at our HR offsite.

We were so privileged to have David, the creator, run the session for our HR staff.

I am quite biased towards the MBTI and have been conducted workshops of Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) to literally hundreds of groups and probably thousands of people, so I was not really impressed by peoples' comments about Colors, or their reference to the instrument, UNTIL last Thursday at our workshop.

In fact, David used some Jungian theory in his development of Colors, along with Freud and two other psychologists, who did not stick in my mind.

The theory was introduced by his wife, Linda, and she kept referring to the fact that the Doctor, would present the second half of the workshop. Well, it was eerie when it was your turn for David to interpret your results. He warned us that would feel like we were naked. He first said to me "Have you ever been a teacher?" to which I said "Yes, a teacher of leaders in organizations."

"You have a way of touching peoples' hearts." he said. And now for the development opportunity, "Do you ever take care of others at the expense of your own needs?"

"Now wait just a minute, are you inside my head? Yes, I often think of others' needs before my own but I have gotten a lot better lately at trying to take care of mine first."

It was a terrific workshop. I talked with David about the correlations between Colors and MBTI, and there are some strong correlations between MBTI and Colors.

That night at dinner, David sat across from me and said casually in conversation "You actually are the High Priestess is the way you touch others."

WOW, I am the High Priestess. These words, I must admit have escaped from my lips many times in the last few days. What a compliment to have my strengths phrased in such a way.

Signing off from the High Priestess . . .

H-Mart What a Trip to the Grocery Store!

Last weekend, Murg and I went shopping to H-Mart which opened recently near us. It is an Asian market and with our recently acquired Thai cooking skills, we adventured there to find some key ingredients. We were moderately successful in finding the Thai ingredients. Some of the reason we did not find the right things is that we do not read Thai, or Chinese, or Korean, or Japanese. Upon reflection, we probably can identified Thai characters but not the content, compared to the other languages listed.

I went one other time, and I was by far in the minority as a Caucasian. There is obviously a need for this grocery store, given the number of Asians who were there shopping, and they seem to go straight for the item they are looking for. We on the other hand do not have a clue unless there is an English translation which occurs only part of the time at H-Mart. The meat and fish aisles alone are worth the trip. The two attached pictures humored me a lot. Vermont Curry? Does anyone in India know where Vermont is? It is Vermont Curry because it is maple flavored. So that is what Vermont is known for.

Smiling Fish just made me smile. Murg bought the Vermont Curry, I think. We did not buy the Smiling Fish.

So, I will go back, but having done some more research. I still need to find sticky rice to make Mango Sticky rice, which apparently you steam in a bamboo steamer rather than how we cook rice.

Such adventures, such fun!

Forced to blog again about air travel

OK finally boarded and after de-boarded and after de-icing we will be taking off. I just want you to know, and yes I am whining, that my flight was the only one delayed, THIS MORNING. Not the same as last night however.

I want to give a shout out to Jetblue customer service who have been patient, courteous, informative (there is a new adjective) and calm.

I took a picture with their permission of Anthony and Randell (BTW he is 6' 11") in Boston. After a 2.5 hour delay they still had their sense of humor when they said "I am sorry that you now have to board."

They brought up snacks for the two + hour delay. This was more food than you get from United and American on a cross country flight.

The biggest asset was that they gave us information when they had it. Most airlines keep this close to the vest and don't want to share why the delay, how long before there is an update, how real is the new time etc.

The prologue to this post is that we took off after being delayed and de-iced, had a realatively smooth flight AND then we circled SFO for about 20 minutes. Because we were low on fuel, we then were diverted to San Jose to refuel and come back to SFO. Ureka, I deplaned at San Jose, called my new best friends at Corporate Travel, got my Hertz rental switched to San Jose, and gave a colleague a ride to the office. San Jose is easily half the drive to Mountain View so all is good.

Sweatshirts are "comfort" food for me

As regular readers are aware I am in a cleansing mode lately. I still have the train from my prior post but today I am cleaning out closets. I did recycle via Salvation Army, a few sweatshirts and I kept a few as well.

I kept my very worn Middlebury one, the one I bought from Bermuda when I met Murg, the one Judy and I bought and wore together NewYear's Eve 1986 and one I bought from UVM, the day Crick graduated.

Obviously I keep ones that are sentimental to me. Today as I dressed to go clear snow off of cars I grabbed the Midd one for warmth and comfort.

I have a very early memory of Mom sitting talking on the phone with Aunty Pat dressed in a warm worn sweatshirt. When I put one on I always think of that image and slightly smile.

Sweatshirts, worn ones are comfort for the soul!


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Left my F at home

I have been meaning to write this for a while now. The impetus at this point is that I am cleaning out and am about to throw out a treasure that I have been lugging around since I received this in the mid 1990s.

The person who gave this was a plant manager who I supported. We had done MBTI training with the entire group and we regularly had conversations around type.

It was a particularly bad time since we were doing layoffs. I dealt with my feelings of awfulness about lay offs privately and I then showed up pretty cold and calloused when we discussed people to be laid off.

The expression we used was "I left my 'F' at home".

So, when I left that group she gave me this train that had both ENFP and ENTP so I could switch them out when I left my F at home.

My current boss recently gave me feedback to show more of my F. Really?????

Have I gone so far over to managing my F? That I show up mostly as a T?

Maybe I should rethink throwing my train away but I figured blogging it and a picture are enough memory.



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Surprises on our Trip to Thailand and Cambodia

Right when we returned from our trip I made a list of things that surprised me on the trip. In no particular order here they are:

You can use the American dollar in Cambodia, in fact it is preferred I think. You get Cambodian notes for change though.

Thailand really does have an incredible service culture. The hands together, Y-ing, gesture is so genuine and is such a part of their culture. In Bangkok, a group of Thais met each other at the luggage carousel, and I could not believe how ingrained it was to greet each other with the Y-ing. Everyone who served us had to have this as a greeting and a departure gesture. They truly, genuinely want to serve you.

I was surprised at how much of the food was accessible to us, in that we did not really have to search for something to eat. As I said in a prior post, we did not follow all the rules of the travel clinic, but even at the road side stand that we stopped at during our tours of Siem Reap, the food was very accessible.

There were guards at the hotel in Bangkok, right at the end of the drive. My first reaction was "Why do there need to be guards?" I am still wondering.

The drivers in Siem Reap are crazy. There is no yielding or merging or even slowing down to get into traffic. Because the other drivers expect this, it does not seem to be a problem. Traffic can be coming at you on either side because someone is getting into traffic, or leaving traffic on the other side of the road.

The only negative of the trip was the scam at the Grand Palace. In the end, we did not get scammed but they tried really hard. We were told by an official looking ARMY person that the temple was closed for the Thais to pray for the New Year. It being December 30th, this seemed possible. The Palace was open though, just two gates down the road. We had a long conversation about this, that night at dinnner. Bee's point, that "He was able to feed his child by participating in this scam, really got me." I hate to be taken advantage of, or for someone to behave in what in my mind is "unethical". I guess the GRAND PALACE SCAMS are such a part of their culture, that they might not even be unethical.

The Siem Reap airport is so casual. We walked across the tarmac into the immigration area with no noticeable guards. It was a peek into prior to 911 airports.

Temples - in Chiang Mai, I did not expect that the temples we were visiting would be "working" temples. Practicing buddhists were stopping by on their way to work, at lunch, or way home from work to give their merits or their alms to the monks. They are old buildings and are museum quality, AND they are practicing temples.

Tipping really is not done in either country. The paradox for me here is, in the US, where the cost of living is so much higher and in many cases the service employees make 100 times more than in Thailand or Cambodia, tipping is expected. In Thailand and Cambodia, they do not expect to be tipped and it is a minimal tip if any. My Western mind is still dealing with this paradox.

Those were the big surprises or the front of mind surprises. These western eyes took in a lot of the Asian culture that we experienced and I am sure I missed a lot too because of my Western lenses.

Food on our Trip to Thailand and Cambodia

I have just been surfing the web to find recipes for my two new favorite dishes, thanks to Bee. In Chiang Mai, she introduced me to Khao Soi, which is the noodle dish for which Chiang Mai is known. It is a curry noodle dish, with cripy noodles served on top. We tried this in several places while there and my favorite sampling was in the restaurant knowns as Chai's. It was either here, or the other restaurant just two doors from there called Prego's. Prego's is a combination of Thai food and Italian food. Both of these restaurants were frequented by her comrades, since they were directly across for Tri Gong Residence where they stayed for 8 weeks.

Khao Soi has a really unique taste which is a combination of the curry, coconut milk and the crispy noodles. As I read on the Internet, some of it's origins are from Burma.

The second dish which was to die for was the Pumpkin and Coconut soup that we discovered at Khmer Kitchen in Siem Reap. As soon as I ordered this and had it for my first meal at Khmer Kitchen, I could not order anything else and we had to go back for more. It was not creamy pumpkin, but chunks of pumpkin. Both Bee and I fell in love with this soup and my goal is to perfect the recipe for her arrival home in May.

We really tried to eat the native food when we were there. Both lunches in Siem Reap, that were part of our tour, were native food. The guide in this case, accompanied us to the table. He then left to eat with the driver outside. Even in the hotel that we stayed in, the tourists ate in the restaurant and the guide ate outside. My inclination was to invite the guide to eat with us, but when I asked him about this, he indicated that this would never happen. There is a certain protocol and they get a discount on the meal by eating outside.

The only really BAD meal I had was breakfast on January 1st at the Bangkok airport. Lord knows what I ordered, but is was really greasy and nearly inedible. Other than this meal, all of the rest were pretty good. Oops, I forgot about the box meals that we got on Thai Airways and Bangkok Airways. The sandwiches in both cases, were a nondescript meat, which I avoided and a lime colored green jelly that did not look at all appetizing. As I said in my prior post, they tried to serve us a meal in a 45 minute flight. It was wasted on me.

The buffet at our hotel in Bangkok was interesting. It provided nearly every nationality something. It was a Swiss hotel, so there was European food. Then there was a variety of Asian food, and I think traditional American breakfast of eggs, sausages and french toast.

We did not follow all of the travel clinic's warnings and I don't think any of us got ill from the food.

So, I am in love with two new dishes and thanks to Bee and her organizing a Thai cooking class for the three of us, I now know how to make Pad Thai, Green Curry and Hot and Sour Shrimp soup.

Second blog on Airlines and flying

We had the opportunity over the last two weeks to have interactions with 5 different airlines. These are my ramblings about those interactions. One leg of our travel, that would have been effected by the British Airlines potential strike was our Logan to Heathrow leg. When there was a possibility of a strike, we decided to buy an insurance ticket so that if there were a strike, we would be able to get to London, on a non-BA flight. We were also worried about the tight connection in London anyway. So Dec 23rd we checked into our Iceland Air flight.

Ever the nosy talkative one, in the security line while chatting with someone, we heard that if you don't check in for the first flight of travel, they cancel the entire ticket. WHAT!!!!!! This is outrageous, and is in the small print. Our logic which did not prevail was that BA was threatening to strike and we needed to be sure we could get to London. Long story short is that we went to the BA lounge, tried to sway the customer service person, got nowhere, got our bags back from Icelandic Air and left on our original BA flight the next morning. We also had a non-refundable night at the Hilton at the airport, so we used that as well. We think our karma turned to positive at the point at which we got our bags back from Icelandic Air.

When we checked into BA the next morning, we had been upgraded to business class. We were so pleased with ourselves, and to this day we are both so curious about why we got upgraded. We were also upgraded on the 11 hour London to Bangkok flight. Business Class is very nice. We actually priced it on a lark while we were at the Hilton. For the 4 legs it would have cost us $19,000. Lucky we did not even consider it, because it cost us nothing in the end.

In Thailand, we used two airlines, Thai Airlines and Bangkok Airlines to go to Cambodia. All 4 of these flights were less than 50 minutes long, AND we were served a box snack. In the US you can fly all across the country and not be given a meal. In Thailand and Cambodia, you get fed on any flight.

We did not get upgraded on our return BA and Qantas flights. In fact, we did not even get seats together because "we have different last names and therefore were not considered a family." Our tickets were not linked in the system. Are you kidding? You know that 6 digit confirmation code. If you pull our record up by that, both of us are listed. We finally did get seated together, after taking up 25 minutes of the person's time. We were not going to give up. In Bangkok, it does not seem OK for women to be pushy and aggressive and stand up for themselves. When I displayed that behavior the ticket agent only would talk and face Murg. It was pretty funny actually, as I leaned over to try to make eye contact with her.

So we get upgraded on the way to Bangkok, and do not even get seated together on the way back. HUH?

The final adventure of our travels was in Heathrow, 10 days after the Christmas Day terrorist tried to blow up the Amsterdam to Detroit Northwest flight. Any flight leaving for the US had an additional security check. They had 5 additional BA ticket agents put on and probably 15 extra security agents to check every bit of your carry on baggage and do a fully body pat down, with a gender specific security personnel. The flights could not have flown to the US, but this must not leave a very good feelings among all of those ticket agents and security personnel. Yes, Americans are targets but I did not feel that great as an American that day in Heathrow.

So my conclusions are that money talks. If you can fly business class do, especially if you get upgraded for free. Buying cheap tickets on the Internet have some risks, and I need to be prepared to take those risks. We are very lucky to be able to travel and even luckier that we overheard and talked with the woman in the security line that night. If we had taken the Icelandic Air flight we could have arrived in London, and had to buy another ticket for $4000 each. YIKES AND OUCH!!!!

These flying experiences opened my eyes to the cultural differences around the world, not just in the arena of planes, flying and airports.