Getting Stuck on a Quilting project

For a variety of reasons, I get stuck on a project.  Right now I am stuck because the piece of fabric I bought for the border is too dark of a teal color.  I could charge ahead and install that piece but it would ruin the flow of the piece, so I am waiting.  The quilt is lying on my design "wall", aka the floor of my sewing room.  I want to leave it out so that I don't forget to finish it and so that I am sure to buy the right color teal the next time.

While I sorted my fabric yesterday, I also put a few piles of fabric down, with the pattern on top for my next few projects.  They are not stuck, they are just not started yet.

Truth be told, some of my works in progress are not really stuck, they are just stalled in that phase of production, and sometimes are too low in the pile to actually see them.  When I sort my fabric I happen upon these little surprised, "Oh, I remember that project, I wonder if I have the pattern?, and I wonder if I know what I am doing next?, and I wonder if I really ever want to finish this one?"

I actually am being patient with myself in this stuckness.  If I plunge ahead, I will put in the wrong piece and will be upset with myself.  If I wait long enough the right piece will emerge from the universe.

For now, I walk into my sewing room and there are piles of projects laid out, and works in progress lying in the design "wall".

Oh the fun of being a textile artist, and of having the right space in which to have chaos that sometimes get converted into order.

Read The Hobbit

"Read the Hobbit" has become a shortcut phrase in our house.  I cannot remember when it started but Chris was young, maybe 8.  One of us was looking for a book to read and Rod said "Read the Hobbit".  I think both Chris and I had started the book earlier than this first episode, but did not get into it, so our experience was not such a positive one at the time.

Any time after that, when the three of us would ask for a book to read, Rod replied "Read the Hobbit".  By this time, out of obstinance we were not going to pick it up.  It was sad that a book that was so dear to Rod was dismissed by the three of us.  I think he is still trying to get us to read it.

So, the topic of seeing the movie comes up, and I think I want to see it.  The dilemna is, will seeing the movie wreck the book for me which is what lots of movies do to perfectly well written books.  On the off chance that some day I do read it, should I wait to see the movie until that day.

Lots of people will think me crazy for my reaction to reading The Hobbit. That is OK.

So, we venture out in the snow later today to see the movie, and maybe, just maybe I will be inspired after having it pushed on me for 27 years to actually read the book.

2012 Christmas Letter- Year in Review

2012 was a year where we were very consciously counting our blessings. You, our friends are many of them.

The first part of the year was a blur.  I do remember that we had a HUGE decision looming.  If Rod's job with Fidelity got moved to Raleigh-Durham, NC, would we move with it?  We both said, we can live anywhere for 2 years, so when the announcement was made in March, we were pretty gung-ho.  When Rod finally got his  paperwork, the deal to follow his job to NC was about the same as the deal to stay until September 2013, and then leave Fidelity with a nice retention bonus and severance package.  The latter is what he is doing.  The big project of 7 years was installed two weekends ago, and he will wrap up and transfer his knowledge of almost 25 years to others who are staying. He doesn't know what the future will hold after September next year but he's not yet comfortable using the word 'retirement' to describe it.

Rod in front of Fidelity NC - down 30 lbs

We spent a nice weekend in NC, at a beautiful resort, fed well by Fidelity and explored some housing.  We even attended the UU Church in Raleigh and liked the feel of that.  We count our blessings to have had options.

Early in the year Rodney got serious about his health and became a 5 day a week regular at the local 'Y' eventually getting up to about 20 miles a week on the treadmill there. His weight was down about 30 lbs by the time he blew his Achilles' tendon over the July 4th week because Sally was away and he felt he could push his limits. The Achilles is almost back in shape now and thankfully the ellipticals at the 'Y' allowed him to get my exercise fix and keep the weight down. Next year the plan is to drop another 30lbs. Our health is a significant blessing and Rodney is trying not to ignore that.

In June, for our 25th wedding anniversary (one of our biggest blessings) we traveled a few days early to our denomination's Annual General Assembly in Phoenix and went up to the Grand Canyon.  OMG, I will never forget the view as we walked around a bend in the path, of the immense view across the Canyon.  We had a nice visit there and did some sight seeing in Phoenix before our business meeting started. The Canyon and Sedona are places we will definitely visit more in the future.   We would NEVER live in Phoenix.  Too damn hot.  We attended a baseball game that was 86 degrees inside while it was 117 degrees outside.



That is the Colorado River

For Sally the  most impactful part of our meeting was a vigil attended by 3000 other Unitarian Universalists at night at Joe Arpaio's Tent City.  Google him if his name is not familiar.  We were warned that there would be counter protesters, who would legally be carrying guns, which with the recent elementary shooting, makes me even more nervous.  This theme of immigration rights flows through the year for Sally as she does her small little part to try to change our broken immigration policies. Rodney participated in a volunteer opportunity to help resident aliens prepare their application for Citizenship - something he was doing himself a few short years ago. In the end,  even though we had hundreds of people lined up for hours before the work began we had such an amazing response from the UU's at GA that we had more volunteers than were needed.

Sisters in DC

Family, represents so many of our blessings. A Sisters visit in September caused us to take a road trip to Philly and DC.  We stayed two blocks from the Capitol and walked a dozen miles each day seeing all the free museums along the mall.  We were impacted by the new memorials since we were in DC 19 years ago.  Where does the time go?  We had dinner one night with Sally's cousin Kit, who the Sisters had met two years prior at Chris and Meg's wedding.



NYC Girls Weekend

NYC visits were plentiful in the fall, with joys and sorrows celebrated.  A dear friend's memorial service was held in late September at All Souls Church.  Two weeks later we met in Brooklyn/Manhattan for Sister-in-Law Judy's BIG birthday.  Brother George surprised her with all of her three siblings and spouses.  The next week Sally had a Star girls weekend in NYC, and escaped the city by bus right before Hurricane Sandy arrived.

Life Size Settlers

Singing at Thanksgiving, words on ceiling

Visits to VT and Coniston are still frequent, and always include a family gathering.  In fact, we drive on Christmas day to Vermont where George and Judy are entertaining the entire family for dinner.  For Thanksgiving, Mike and Peg did the same at their house in VT.  Our lawn in Vermont was the second installation of a life size Settlers of Catan game.  With the help of fertilizer, the game board is permanently in the front lawn.



Two generations

Chamber Crew on Star with Amy

Other life events, Chris and Meg bought their first house in Essex Junction VT after living at our house in VT for 10 months.  They also traveled with George and Judy and Mom and Charlie to Alaska.  It was a very special three generation trip. 


Bethany started Divinity school part time, switched jobs to the Director of Social Action at the Concord MA UU church and she, her boy friend Bryan and Shakes the wondercat, moved into a cute third floor apartment in Watertown Square. 




Sally continues to fill her time with volunteer works, tutoring, hospice  and now immigrant rights.  She has done a little bit of paid work this year and will probably continue some executive coaching, when it can fit into her schedule.  She had two injuries this year.  Tripping up the patio steps in July caused a very dramatic knee injury and falling down the same steps in November broke her wrist.  She now has a piece of metal in her wrist holding her radial bone together.

Distant Cousin Linda who joined us on Star this year

She continues to serve on the Board of Star Island Corporation and traveled four times to the Island this year. 2 Board meetings and our regular week the second week of July.  A distant cousin, Linda, joined us on Star this year and it was great to reconnect.  In August, Sally worked as a volunteer on Star in the chamber crew with her friend Amy.  We make a mean hospital corner and boy can we bleach a toilet!  We were also at least 30 years older than the college ago kids who helped us to learn the job.  And the sunsets were magnificent.

This Rodney joined the board of Communities Without Borders which is the group who organised the trip he and Bethany took to Zambia in 2005. It now supports almost 1,000 children orphaned by the AIDS epidemic. If you want to see more go visit communitieswithoutborders.org to see what we do.

As we continue to count our own blessings our hearts go out to others less fortunate. This year mental health seems to have woven it's way into our lives. The psychotic who Rodney and others had to hold down for an hour on a boat ride out to Star Island, suicides of colleagues and friends family members, and of course the current horrors in Sandy Hook at the school a young adult friend of ours attended as a child.

Every year as we sit down to write our letter/blog post, there seems to be something happening in the world that is unfathomable and this year is no exception.  Newtown, Portland, Syria, Aurora, gun control to name a few.  We were happy with the Nov 6th results but realize that almost half of the voters in the US, were not happy.  Our hope and prayer for 2013 is to work together and be kind to each other. Our blessings are many, we hope yours will be also in 2013.



I wait for Santa and the arrival of the Oranges

Today's boxes

This time of year, there is a lot of waiting, patiently, for people to arrive and things to happen.  Almost since I left the family home, I have been receiving oranges from Florida at this time of year.  The boxes on the step are always a surprise though.  I did not know I was waiting for them, until I opened the door just now and saw this.

My grandmother always sent us a big box, and in fact, we store our Christmas decorations in those boxes, which are very strong BTW.  Living in New England, the arrival of citrus from Florida is so wonderful, and I feel like a queen until we make our way through that box.


Mom took over sending the box when Mama died in 1993, and I don't realize it but I am patiently awaiting their arrival.  It is a big part of our traditions this time of year, and I always remember Mama when they arrive.  The only senile thing she did was call Rodney, Roger.  One of our boxes came to Mr. and Mrs. Roger Lowe.  I loved her for this tiny flaw, and we still have the label on one of those older boxes.



Older boxes are from Mama

So as we proceed into the darkest time of the year, and continue to wait patiently for things to happen, we are blessed with sunshine and love of family, from Florida





Hospice miracles of the season

One of the patients who I have been visiting for several months is usually sleeping.  She sometimes acknowledges me when I sit down.  For most of our sessions she is sleeping or resting.

Today when I arrived one of her sons was playing the harmonica for her, while continually holding her hand.  It was so precious.  After some of the songs, even though her eyes were still closed, she mouthed "Thanks for that song".  This was the first time I have met any of her family.  After he was done with his repertoire, I suggested some Christmas Carols, which he then launched into.

After one of these, she opened her eyes, and said "I really liked that song."

As he was about to leave, and while he was saying goodbye, she put her hands on either side of his face and spoke his name several times.  It was so touching.  Often you are not sure if patients even know you are there.  In fact, they are more aware of your presence than we know.

I pondered what it must be like to not remember a familiar face, and then to switch into knowing that person intimately.  I speculated that maybe she knew him for the harmonica music he played when she was younger and more alert.  For that split second she knew exactly who he was, and that he had just played beautiful music.

For 15 minutes after he had left, when she did open her eyes she called out his name.  I replied that he had just left but that while he was there he played some awesome music.

I left her listening to her Christian prayers, which obviously gave her lots of comfort.  She even felt her non existent rosary beads during one of the prayers.  Those traditions and rituals are very important reminders of faith, especially when parts of our memory have left us.

I think I saw several miracles during my visit today.

Cannot quite process this latest shooting

I cannot quite process a shooting in a kindergarten class, and yet I have to watch the news for updates.  It is not the same at all, but this is the way I felt watching 911.  This is a different time, because when I logged into Facebook just now, many of my friends have commented about the shootings, and a dear friend used to live in this town.  Even though I am sitting at home alone, I feel connected to them as I process this latest horrible news.

I have to believe that we have two big issues here, gun control and mental health.  Gun control is legislative.  Mental Health is so complex.  There is so much we just don't know about the brain and what could cause anyone to shoot a kindergartner.

I wonder if the news media did not cover things like this 24/7, if there would be less of it?

For some people the only way to get your minute of fame is to do something like this.  I remember feeling that way when the attempt was made on Reagan's life.

My inclination is to grab my loved ones and crawl into a cave somewhere.  I am doing the next best thing by retreating to Vermont/Coniston with a lot of my family and friends for the weekend.

As Ellen DeGeneres says at the end of each show "Be kind to one another". 

Surgery update

Since I am "one-handed typing" this post will be lots of pictures.

I wore this bulky foam rectangle a lot in the last 2+ weeks.  It prevented me from really injuring myself right after surgery and was a comfortable place to lean the wrist.  BTW, the wine glass in this picture belongs to my daughter, not me, and we are watching the results of the election.  I was on Percocet, so wine would have been a really bad idea.

My surgery was on November 9th at a pretty quiet Lahey facility in Peabody, MA.  While in the waiting room, we noticed these cool monitors so that loved ones could watch the progress of the patient.  The smiley face means you can visit them.  Rod took pictures of my progress. 

 And here I am right before surgery listening very attentively to what is about to happen.

For those who have not heard yet, apparently I talked for 1.5 hours non-stop.  I had a nerve block and was still awake for the procedure.  Clearly the way I cope with things is to talk.  My surgeon said it was remarkable that someone could keep talking for that long.  I remember thinking, why not just keep talking it is a way to pass the time, I don't really care if anyone is listening and that was my natural reaction to being mildly sedated with a plate being inserted into my arm.

Wrist Injury-Using Dragon software finally

For those of you who don't know Monday I fell up our patio stairs and broke my wrist. I just move too fast. I come by this honestly since my mom is as impulsive as I am. She recently had an injury as well to her hand. The cast right now is a great reminder to just slow down but going forward I need other reminders. I need to not have my head in the clouds, I need to look down and watch for the potholes, I need to just not move so fast!

One idea I have is just have a padded spacesuit around me I wear at all times to protect me from my falls. I could carry my hiking sticks that I bought myself in July after a fall up the same stairs.

I am actually amazed that I reached the ripe middle age of 58 before I broke a bone. I guess I spoke too soon as I gloated and said I have never broken a bone. My wrist surgeon showed me the break and showed me where my radial bone is not holding the rest of the wrist bones on top of it correctly.

Friday I go in for plates and pins surgery. I am actually looking forward to the surgery since the pain I'm feeling is probably because the bones are not in alignment. I never take pain medication but Percocet is my friend right now. I know it is easy to get addicted to it but for now I look forward to that every six hours little white pill.

I am accident prone, I am clumsy and for now the cast is a reminder to slow down look down and maybe I will carry those hiking sticks. BTW I'm using voice recognition software for blogging and as an extrovert, you will now hear way more than you need to know about my life.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Grief revisited today

This collage sits on my desk of
Daddy as a little boy and a
family needlepoint

When I hear of another death it allows me to revisit the losses in my life.  Yesterday, through as email from a dear friend, we heard of a 20 year old who took his own life.  It stopped me in my tracks as I felt deeply for his family.  I wondered how it would be best to reach out to them and I plan to attend a wake or service when they happen.

17 years ago today, my world stopped as Daddy died suddenly.  A dark veil was dropped on me that day, and the veil will always be there.  It is thinner now, but it is always there. I will never forget that split second when my brother Charles, on the phone, told me that Daddy had died.  We knew earlier that he was in surgery for an aneurysm, and that his chances of living were slim, but there was always a bit of hope. 

My legs collapsed underneath me and a few minutes later, a friend handed me a glass of water.  I was at a youth retreat with Christopher, and the leaders conducted a service of grief for all the youth and leaders.  It was a perfect service to share our very recent grief, and to allow the others in the circle to share griefs they had never spoken aloud.

It was the exact place for Christopher and myself to be as we prepared to travel a few hours to my family home, and grieve deeply with my mother and siblings.  Rod and Bethany travelled the two hours from Lexington and picked us up and we drove to Brandon to arrive there in the wee hours of the next day.

The next week was a blur, of family and friends stopping by with bundt cakes, and burying Daddy in a family cemetery in New Haven VT.

Every November 4th, I stop and grieve, and today I also grieve for that young man who was in such despair that he could not go on living.

Hug your loved ones today, enjoy each connection you have today with another person who is dear to you.

I Quilt when there is a weather disaster

Today as we await the arrival of Hurricane Sandy, I sat down at my machine to put a border on my latest project.  For the quilters in the audience, I am attempting a Flying Geese pattern in the border of a Yellow Brick Road pattern.

As I sat sewing today, I realized that at least two other memorable quilting projects have happened during a weather emergency.  It is not surprising that I am inside and therefore think of quilting.  It must be my comfort "food".  Oh, I eat my comfort food as well.

The first quilt I recalled was one I called "Shattered Comfort" since it was a quilt that I made after 911, when the images on the TV were just too much to handle.  I listened but did not watch.  This hangs in George and Judy's house.

 

The second one was the original quilted jacket.  I had bought the kit and pattern in early December of either 2000 or 2001, and a few weeks later we had a major snowstorm.  Out came the pattern and fabric and I am pretty sure I finished the jacket in a few days.  The original is on the left and Judy's New Year's Eve jacket is on the right.

The lesson I am taking from this is make sure there is an unfinished project at all times, in case there is a natural disaster.  BTW, that is not the only reason to have unfinished projects.  My preference in Myers Briggs is P, and we usually have a stack of projects which are 90% complete.

Off the work on this latest natural disaster quilting project and listen to the wind outside while sewing in the comfort of our house, as long as the electricity is still on.

Day 2 - Washington DC

We really did have a whirlwind trip to DC with the Sisters (Mavis, Doreen and Karen).  We got up on the second day and ate at a diner really near the Capitol.  We love to find the non-touristy restaurants and through Yelp we found Pete's Diner.  Great breakfast, wonderful customer service and we were fueled for the day.

Bethany told me to make sure to see the Museum of the American Indian and I respect her opinion so I spent most of our three hours there.  From the outside design, to the organization of the inside by tribes, this museum is wonderful.  I found during this museum that I don't go through a museum sequentially.  Rather, I try to spend time on areas with information that I could not look up on the Internet.  I loved the arrangement by partial circles of the tribes, and the themes of what happened to the American Indian.  Rod and I ate lunch in that cafeteria, which was the food from some of the Indian tribes.

We stopped at the Pentagon to view the memorial there.

Our last stop in DC was at Arlington Cemetery.  I have not been there since Mama died in 1993.  Her name is now engraved on the back of her husband's, Grandpa Joe, who I never knew.  The English family toured the Kennedy graves and the tomb of the unknown soldier.

We left DC at 3:40 pm and drove pretty much uninterrupted to arrive at Lexington just after 1am.  We did have one minor mishap around NYC, when our car wanted to go across the GW bridge but we talked it out of that and we toured Teaneck for a few minutes.  Once we got on the Palisades Parkway, we pulled over at an overlook to look back at Manhattan.  This was at about 9:30-10:00pm so the view was wonderful at night.

After this full two days, we decided that once we are both retired, we want to spend a few months around DC taking in all the free museums, concerts, and touring the Civil War battles fields.  House swap anyone?

Day 1 - Washington DC, has it really been 19 years?

As part of our two week visit from the English family, we traveled to Philly and Washington DC.  We spent most of two days very near the Mall, taking advantage of all of those museums that our tax dollars pay for.

We check in at the Hyatt Regency just after 5pm at night.  This hotel is two blocks from the Capitol, so we figured it was convenient, and since they are remodelling we got a great deal on the rooms.  Oh, and it was the weekend so the Government was not around.  I have a question, "Why do all of the big hotels in DC, have prostitutes who walk in front of the entrances in broad day light?"  When Rod and I were "courting" we met in DC in a hotel in Dupont Circle and they were also very obvious.  No need to answer that question!  I think I understand human nature, but it was striking, as we checked in at 5pm at night, and it was way more obvious that in other cities, and hotels that I have stayed in.

The next morning, after a wonderful breakfast at West Wing Cafe, we bought the on-off trolley ticket which was fabulous.  The narrators were really incredible so if you go, choose one with a live narrator.  I had not seen the Holocaust Museum, so after traversing the mall several times on the Trolley we got off there.

I have learned that when I am in a museum, I don't want to be constrained by the pace of others, so we said, "let's meet in 90 minutes!".  I then took off to experience the museum by myself.  I have heard a lot about the Holocaust Museum, and it really was moving.  I was struck by how civil people were, and quiet.  As I walked through, I wondered how many people around me lost family members during that time.  I actually finished the permanent exhibit, and went back to view a few parts in more detail.  I also went through the rooms, that were designed for children.  This was the only place I saw someone taking pictures and she was asked to stop taking them.

We then grabbed a hot dog from the street vendor, ate it standing up, and boarded another trolley to travel to the war museums.  Here I was struck that most of what we saw that day was oriented around a war:  Holocaust, WWII, Vietnam, Korean, Lincoln Memorial.  This is where we also discussed that it has been 19 years since we were sight seers in DC.  My maternal grandfather was killed in WWII so we took pictures at the WWII memorial, of Virginia (His home state), Alaska (where he was killed) and Vermont (Where my other grandfather who served in WWII was from). 

We then boarded another trolley, and did the loop which goes by all of the embassies.  I want to go back and walk those streets, but it was fun to fly by them on the bus.  The National Cathedral is under construction, and it was still magnificant.  Georgetown on the trolley, and then back to the hotel.

We had dinner at Union Station and had arranged for my cousin Kit to join us.  She lives in DC and it was great to catch up with her.

After "The Sisters" went to bed that night, Rod and I went for a long walk, around the Capitol, down to the Washington Monument and back to the hotel.  It was a quiet night on Capitol Hill, and fun to revisit our walking days of DC in 1986.

Lessons Learned from Chamber crew at Star Island

This past week, I volunteered with my friend Amy, on Star Island.  We were assigned to the Chamber crew.  This is where all of the entry level volunteers are assigned.  Bright and early on Sunday morning we reported to the Linen Closet, which is in the basement of the Oceanic hotel on Star Island.

I learned a lot this week and here are three of them:

1. If you say you "Can't" you probably can, with some practice.  At the beginning of the week, as we were occuping ourselves folding linens, I really resisted folding contour sheets.  My MOM taught me how to fold sheets as a young lass, so it is not that I DON'T know how to fold them.  They are just difficult for me.  Amy asked me what I do at home with contours, and being a path of least resistance kind of person, I strip the bed in the morning, wash the sheets during the day, and put them directly back on the bed.  No folding needed.  However, as the week wore on, and as I listened to the professional chamber workers, I realized that with lots of practice, and I mean folding sheets in the tens if not hundreds, that I actually learned to like folding contours.  Notice I did not say LOVE!  So whereas I resisted on Sunday, by Friday I was actually reaching into the never ending bin of folding opportunities, for a contour.
2. Bleach, is a really good disinfectant and cleaner, and it does whiten things.  Living on Star Island, which is 40 acres big, with 400 others, is tight quarters.  There are many procedures in place to make Star seem like it is 1900 still.  Part of the intrigue of the Island is that you can go back over 100 years, as you sit in a rocking chair on the front porch, look out across Gosport Harbor to Appledore and Smuttynose.  Things have changed, but very little in some ways.  One of our jobs, in our 3 times a day rounds, was to disinfect the common living areas and the guest quarters.  With a bucket of diluted bleach, a rag and rubber gloves, off we went to clean while the conferees were eating their meals in the 19th century dining room.  Because of our waste water treatment plant, and the regulatory discharge rules, we cannot let bleach get into the system.  The white towels, and wash clothes become stained, and dirty and we cannot use bleach out there.  One of the tasks is literally, with a tooth brush and a paste of cream of tartar and diluted bleach, to scrub stains out of the linens.  Believe me it was a thankless job, and one that we wondered aloud if there was any positive result.  However, we were sitting outside doing this, and talking with a few others while we scrubbed away, and we were looking out on White Island Light House, so the task was arduous but the scenery was fabulous.  AND, my favorite Star Island shirt is now covered with spots of white, from when I sprayed the bleach bottle in the wrong direction.
3. Our young adults are very wise, full of energy and dedicated and brave.  The job we had on Star is a difficult one, and keeping everyone clean and healthy was compounded by a virus among the community.  Working with the CDC, the management team has put procedures in place to minimize the impact of the virus, on the workers and the guests.  There were a few disgusting tasks that chamber has to do, that the young workers would not allow Amy and myself to do.  We are eternally grateful for this gesture.  As they put on their masks, and gloves, and other protective equipment to go clean up a bathroom, or guest room, I marvelled that they did not get on the next boat to the mainland.  We discussed in our three times a day meetings, what was being done across the teams on the Island, to ensure good hygiene and safety.  They had really good ideas, and alternate solutions to issues, and verbalized these.  Often times their suggestion was implemented.  This community makes it safe to be open and honest, and brave.  Let's hope that Star is a microcosm for the others communities that these young adults return to at the end of the summer

We returned home exhausted, and I wonder how the Pelicans (college age workers on the Island), do it day after day.  I do know in a way, why they work there.  The natural beauty, the lack of technology and the deep community that is built there year after year.

Measuring tapes gender differences

We were having some work done on a bathroom recently.  The male carpenter asked if I had a measuring tape.  I reached into my knitting bag and produced a measuring tape that I use in knitting and because it is a nice long one, I actually use it to measure most everything I need to measure up to 4 feet long.

This friend looked at me as if I had two heads and not being a person of many words, that was about it.  I wondered what the problem was.  I had actually laid my hands on it in less than 15 seconds, which is pretty good in our house.

I soon realized that he meant one of those measuring tapes, that retracts and lays on the item you are about to measure and has a hook to hold onto that end so you can measure pretty long things.  He meant a "measuring tape".

I said to him at this point, "You mean a male measuring tape?".  We both laughed and about 100 times since then, this expression has been of use.  "Oh, you mean a female measuring tape" or "Oh, you mean a male measuring tape".

Gender differences are pretty funny, aren't they?

We found the best Maple Cremee in VT!

This summer I am on the quest for the best Maple Cremee. When I mention this to many non-Vermonters, I get that "What the heck are you talking about now?" quizzical look. I am not even sure this is a broad Vermonter thing, but in the circles I move in, in the Green Mountain State, it is.

Two weekend ago, I drove north to our South Hero home, Coniston, with two girl friends. As we approached the middle of the afternoon, we were in the center of Vermont, and I asked aloud, "I wonder where we could get a Maple Cremee?". First two quizzical looks! Then the question, "What is a Maple Cremee?" simultaneously they asked. Just wait, and you will see.

Phone calls to two close Vermont relatives later, produced our first one, at Morse Farm in Montpelier, with brother Ken. This one was mapley and creamy, and a little too much of both. My two girlfriends ordered a mixture of chocolate and maple, and the chocolate seemed to cut the taste of the maple, in a good way. C+ score from me, and the small portion was not SMALL!

Fast forward to Sunday of this week. SIL Judy swears that Burlington Bay Market has the best in the same way that I swear Allenholm Farm 2.5 miles from Coniston has the best. They are the best, and the closest for both of us, which helps with our individual claims. We have both sampled the most from these two institutions and have a fondness for them. I tried the Burlington Bay one since I was staying the night with Judy and it was good, creamy and a B+.

On Monday as Judy and I headed to Long Point to spend two days with a distant cousin, Linda, we pulled the car over at the Love Shack in North Ferrisburgh. Their claim to fame are chocolate chip cookies (warm fresh ones and frozen dough to take home), AND they sell Maple Creamees!  We were approaching a near perfect one, we both agreed with chunks of actual maple candy in the creemee. The only deductions were for the size of the cone. Too big! BTW, this was our lunch on Monday!

Tuesday, also for lunch, we tried the Maple Frozen Yoghurt at Dakin Farms in Ferrisburgh. The counter person, when we mentioned that portions were too big, said she could split a small between two cones. A+ for customer service, and A for maple, but not a Cremee, rather a frozen yogurt. Again, this was our lunch.

Today, as we left Long Point after our heavenly two days, we returned to the Love Shack. We ate our lunch first this time.  Only Maple Cremees for three days in a row for lunch would be too much! We stepped up to the counter, and saw that they have a Baby size of a coffee/maple mixture, which we both ordered. Both of us agree that this was the A+, best Maple Cremee.

The purist among you will argue that with the coffee mixed in, this is not a Maple Cremee. We are ignoring any nit picking for this contest, and making up our own rules.

Best Maple Cremee- LoveShack, baby size, coffee/maple mixture!

I gotta be more careful

I come by it honestly, I am impulsive and prone to falls just like my Mom.  We both move quickly, and often are in conversation or have our head in the clouds.  We don't see the pot holes and we step in them.

The Friday before I left for Star, I tripped on the hammock stand.  My left foot stayed put and the entire force of my body went down on the right knee.  I have bad knees and until my surgery a few years ago, my right knee would occasionally give out.  The arthroscopic surgery fixed it, and honestly, I think my yoga practice has kept my knees and back healthy.  This was not the same kind of fall.

My family thought this was a knee give-out fall, since they have lived with me for over 20 years.  I ordered them around, asking for ice, refusing help to get up etc.  Following the advice of everyone, I iced it and kept it elevated for much of the first 24 hours at Star.  I also wore a "sock" on my knee for compression.  At Star there was a friend who is a PT, who gave me great advice on how to treat the knee.

Unfortunately, on Wednesday, I re injured it, tripping up the front stairs of the hotel at Star.  I was carrying too many things, and was not holding the railing.  I currently have a really colorful bruise from the around my knee cap down the front of my leg.

What have a I learned from this injury:  1)  Use the railings (my women's group today helped remind me of that one.  2)  Slow down.  Since the injury I have actually been approached stairs differently and rather than running of them, I have been walking on my heels up them  3)  To be safe I am going to get some assisted devices.  I ordered hiking sticks for my Mom and myself and I am going to try to start using them. 

Funny story, I have a cane and tried using that yesterday around the house to experience what the walking sticks will be like.  I left it lying around and tripped over it.  This is going to be a journey to learn to slow down and walk more deliberately.

This is not the first post I have made about accidents, and probably won't be the last.  Oh well......

My Summer Service at First Parish today - July 15, 2012

Below is the text of my summer service given at First Parish Lexington on July 15, 2012.  My altar looked like this:

Opening words

I knew this would happen that I would change my sermon slightly or hugely on Star.  I signed up for this summer sermon slot for this very reason.  We just spent a wonderful week on our beloved Star Island, where I first discovered that I have spirituality and where I have returned for the last 18 summers, to renew myself, to dive deeper into my spirituality and to spend time contemplating what is important in my life, our lives.  Please join me today on this journey during our time together.

Sally holds up picture that Joni Lipton gave them and Reads:

If once you have slept on an island

You'll never be quite the same

You may look as you looked the

Day before & go by the same old name

You may bustle about the street or shop

You may sit at home and ponder

But you'll see blue water & wheeling gulls

Wherever you may wander

You may chat with your neighbors of this and that

And close to your fire keep

But you'll hear ship whistle & lighthouse bell

And tides beat through your sleep

Oh you won't know why & can't say how

Such change upon you came

But once you have slept

On an island

You will never be

Quite the same.

Rodney Reads:

What I loved in the beginning, I think, was mostly myself.

Never mind that I had to, since somebody had to.

That was many years ago.

Since then I have gone out from my confinements,

through with difficulty.

I mean the ones that thought to rule my heart.

I cast them out, I put them on the mush pile.

They will be nourishment somehow (everything is nourishment

somehow or another).

And I have become the child of the clouds, and of hope.

I have become the friend of the enemy, whoever that is.

I have become older and, cherishing what I have learned,

I have become younger.

And what do I risk to tell you this, which is all I know?

Love yourself.  Then forget it.  Then, love the world.

~ Mary Oliver ~

Grey Hymnal 298

Wake now my senses

Wake now my senses and hear the earth call

feel the deep power of being in all

Keep with the web of creation your vow

giving, receiving as love shows us how

Wake now my reason reach out to the new

join with each pilgrim who quests for the true

Honor the beauty and wisdom of time

suffer thy limit and praise the sublime

Wake now compassion, give heed to the cry

voices of suffering fill the wide sky

Take as your neighbor both stranger and friend

praying and striving their hardship to end

Wake now my conscience with justice thy guide

join with all people whose rights are denied

Take not for granted a privileged place

God's love embraces the whole human race

Start of Homily

When I was asked by Peter to do a summer service I immediately replied yes, and when he asked me to pick one of the themes from this year I jumped on stewardship.  You might not know but our chalice circles here at First Parish follow the monthly sermon topics and I found that as an individual I grew the most during our chalice circle's stewardship session.  That is why I chose to tackle it.  Before I tell you my thoughts I would be interested in how you would complete this sentence in 10 words or less, Stewardship is ...

I had drafted my homily 2 weeks ago, however, an incident which happened 10 days ago caused my sermon to take a 90 degree turn.  My personality type is one which allows me to connect disparate thoughts and make a casserole out of these disparate thoughts, and a pretty good casserole.  What it means for this morning is that I will loosely connect this experience of 10 days ago with the title of stewardship.  Hang with me, this will be a circuitous journey and we will get to the end and you might understand a bit about how I view stewardship.

A brief bit of history, while at General Assembly this year, I attended the vigil at Sheriff Joe Arpaio's tent city which is a tent city, a detention center for undocumented immigrants in Maricopa County in Phoenix, Arizona.  Me and 3000 other yellow-shirted Unitarian Universalists stood on the side of love, witnessed with the immigrant rights partners and became allies. For those of you who do not know about Joe Arpaio, google him, ARPAIO.   He prides himself on being the toughest sheriff in the US.  Conditions for the undocumented immigrants in his tent city are inhumane at best.  120 degrees in the middle of the desert, in a tent because the cells are full, 2 meals a day, no free access to water, pink underwear and socks, (so they don't sell them on the outside).  The most distressing testimonial I heard at one of our plenary sessions, was from a woman who had been detained in the tent city, and was handcuffed to the bed as she gave birth to her child.  She was talking to us while holding that child.  The vigil was very moving! You can read more details about it in my blog, sally-alwaysaskingwhy.blogspot.com which is listed at the bottom of your order of service.

Last Friday, Friday the 6th of July, before I left for Star Island I went to Waltham to tutor my learner who is a 40 year old woman from Guatemala with a husband and 2 children.  I tutor her through an agency in Waltham called WATCH, which provides education and support for immigrant families in Waltham.  A handful of First Parishioners tutor at WATCH.  I am referring to her as a learner and not using her name to protect her. 

She had been distant for a few weeks and did not want to meet.   She finally agreed to meet.  I asked "How are you?"  and with tears in her eyes she said "ICE agents took my brother 3 weeks ago.".  ICE stands for immigration and customs enforcement.  Needless to say whatever we were going to do for that hour was pushed aside.  She told me his story, her brother has been here for 27 years, married to a Canadian citizen who is in the process of applying for her green card.  He has a 21 year old, an 18 year old and an 8 year old.  The 21 year old is an American citizen, and applied to sponsor his father, my learner's brother, for citizenship.  The cynic in me says this is how they got his address, from the application.  He was taken at 6am in front of his 8 year old and is in Plymouth Massachusetts in a prison right now. 

She also told me about 4 others in their community who have been taken in the last month.  They were all arrested for doubtful offenses like scratching a car that was across a parking lot from where he was making a phone call on his cell phone.  Another one was arrested for trespassing by standing in the parking lot of a neighboring business.  Behavior like Joe Arpaio's is happening in our back yard, one town away.  Somehow when it is happening in Phoenix, even though I went to the vigil, it seemed unreal, or surreal.  However, when it is happening 2 blocks from the Waltham Library, which is where she and I meet every week, it brought it home to me, literally.  In the past year she has become my friend and I get mad when friends get treated unfairly and live in fear.  She is afraid that she and her husband will be taken in front of their 11 year old son and 7 year old daughter and they have lived in the US for 19 years.  She did not know whether to tell me since she is so fearful and doesn't know who to trust.  We gained trust with each other.  I encouraged her to ask for help at WATCH, and told her I would ask around to see if there are resources available for her and other undocumented immigrants.

If you know me at all you know that I have passion, and I get angry when things are not right or fair.  What we have here is a broken immigration policy and ICE agents who are implementing it.  Someone on Star kept reminding me that this is an election year.  That does not make this right.  My Facebook post read last Friday: "Someone will be sorry they poked this sleeping lioness!". What my learner said during our hour together is "we are not criminals, we are hardworking people.  This is not freedom I heard about before I came here.". What I said is "yes, you are a hard worker.  You, meaning her community, you mow our lawns, clean our houses and take care of elderly in our nursing homes."  BTW, Jobs that many Americans would not/do not do.

The title of my blog post right after I left her was "don't know whether I am more SAD or MAD right now." 

So how does this tie into stewardship.  For me stewardship is being a steward with my money, time and energy.  It means pushing forward on an issue that I feel passionate about.  It means pouring my money and time into someone or something that needs my money and time.

My husband Rodney and I in the last few years have narrowed the number of organizations to which we donate large amounts of money.  We give small amounts to our alma maters, we always give at GA to the local organization, we give a 20 bill when the congregation gives the plate away once a month.  Our two large donation receivers are First Parish and Star Island.  Unfortunately these are both institutions which spend large amounts of capital to keep their old wooden buildings open and safe.  Why do we give to these two? The short answer is that they are in line with our values, and they feed us spiritually, and they are our intentional community.

It has taken almost 20 years of attendance at both First Parish Lexington and Star Island for us to narrow our donations down to these two, and for me to figure out in my gut why.  Some of it has to do with aging and realizing my mortality.  Some of it is that I want these institutions to be around for my grandchildren and my community.  The biggest part is community though.  Where do I turn when I have a joy or sorrow?  Where do people know me well and I know them well, and we really care about each other?  What do I want to be around in 100 years, and who needs my support and stewardship?  We have to have a community like this to feed each other so we can go stand at a vigil, or visit immigrants in prison or work tirelessly to change legislation and therefore erase implementation of broken policies.

Financial stewardship is one part, but helping hands and loving hearts and minds is another.  I don't know about you but some days, the number of people who need my financial support and helping hands is overwhelming.  Especially going to General Assembly, where there are so many people doing so many good things, I want to try to do it all.  But, I know focus is essential.

For First Parish, I have been pretty involved since the day I stepped across the threshold.  Why? Because the organization needs volunteers, and I want to be involved.  We are healthy pledgers and we give our hands and hearts to this loving community, we participate in the stewardship of the congregation.

Star Island also needs my help.  I am in my fourth year of service on the Star Island Board.  I bring skills which the Board needs.  It is a heavy fiduciary responsibility to serve on this board.  In the recession it is touch and go whether we can fill the beds, keep the wooden structure up to code and pay the bills.  Kind of like here except here we fill the pews instead of beds.  We recently gave a healthy donation to a capital campaign and every year donates to the Star island annual program fund.

Where do the tent city vigil, Joe Arpaio and my learner fit in?  I am prepared to work for immigrant rights, to stand on the side of love with migrants and their families.  My stewardship will include making the United States a fairer place for immigrants.  Within an hour of leaving her that Friday I called up two people who might know immigration lawyers I could talk to about this, and one who I could send my learner to.  Cindy sent me a link to UU Mass Action for follow up opportunities from GA.  At GA upon hearing the woman speak who had her child in prison, we gave $1000 on the spot to a partner organization who is helping undocumented immigrants with their rights.

I won't probably add a third organization to First Parish Lexington and Star but I might if I think it would help.  I just might become a steward of another needy important organization and one I have passion for.  I just might because as someone at Star said, about his donation to the Star Island annual program fund, you have to give until it hurts.  May it be so.

Our prayer this morning will be sung, and will be slower than we usually sing it, and will be sung through twice

Spirit of Life - Prayer

Spirit of life come unto me

Sing in my heart all the stirrings of compassion

Blow in the wind rise in the sea

Move in the hand giving life the of justice

Roots hold me close wings set me free

Spirit of life come to me come to me

Participation - Bethany Lowe in ten words or less how do you steward First Parish?

1020 Teal “Singing the Journey”  Woyaya

Benediction

Two hours after I left my learner I texted her (((hugs))).  Within two minutes she texted back, "thank you my best friend".  I burst our crying with sadness and anger.  Sometimes to be a steward in a community it is as simple as texting hugs.  As you leave the service think about who you might send hugs to today.  I ask you to think about your stewardship and how it has evolved.  The world needs our hands and hearts in addition to our money.

Don't know whether I am more SAD or MAD right now

I have been tutoring a woman for the last year. We meet once a week, at the Waltham Library and we have been learning about GED stuff recently.

A few weeks ago, she was very reticent, and did not want to meet but finally today we met. Her brother was taken by ICE three weeks ago, at 6:30 am in the morning in front of his 8 year old daughter. She and her husband fear for themselves as do her entire community. 4 others have been taken in the last few weeks, for stupid reasons. One was talking outside on his mobile, and the agents said he scratched a car that was parked close to him. Bullshit. They are inventing reasons to arrest people and then asking for their paperwork. I would not be asked! Something she said brought me to tears, "We are not criminals, we are hard workers." I said back, "Yes, you clean our houses, mow our lawns and take care of our elderly in nursing homes."

I was at GA in Phoenix, and we attended the vigil at the tent city there. Somehow, when this is happening in our backyard, literally, it makes it that much more personal.

I am so sad, and so angry that our government has such a broken immigration policy and that these inhumane practices are being allowed to continue.

So, I am about to leave for a wonderful week on Star Island, and that will leave me lots of opportunity to get even more reeved up about this issue. All I can say is when you attack my friends, ones who I have grown to love over the last year, you have poked the sleeping lioness, and you will be sorry.

We have a broken immigration policy and officials are doing their job to implement it, but they are breaking up families and leave a population in fear every day. Ones who have lived here for 27 years, or 19 years. Ones who have worked hard for the immigrant's dream of freedom.

This is not my United States of America.

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Sweets, what is up?

I am not really tempted by sweets. I choose a bag of chips over a piece of cheesecake.

Something has gone awry in the last 24 hours however, and I think it has to do with the power of suggestion. I have been surfing the recipe sites to find a good pie recipe for the fourth of July. I don't usually make a pie on the fourth. If I went unchecked based on the number I have saved I would be making 6-7. The only limiting factor is the number of pie pans at Coniston.

I also just returned from Allenholm Farm in South Hero having devoured by first maple Cremee of the year. There is a contest in the part of VT for who has the best one, and in my mind it s Allenhom, but maybe that is because they are 2 miles away.

After my "lunch" the sugar high has hit, my body feels like it is racing,etc. the buttermilk pie I am making later today will be shared with friends and family and maybe making a berry pie is a new part of the fourth for me. Red raspberries, blue blue berries and white heavy whipping cream. Yum!

I am NOT craving cheesecake so I am not too worried just yet.


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HP Tech Support AHA moment

The saga of our HP tower continues.....

We bought our HP computer in Nov of 2010 from Costco. In less than two years, we have had 2 new mother boards sent and installed at home. This was after I fought back shipping it for 14 days back to HP both times.

Yesterday on the phone the second tech support person I talked to acknowledged that the original mother board and 2 replacements were faulty. In fact the one from February that was sent and installed, was right before they starting using the good ones, he said. I am cautiously optimistic about this success and will try to suspend judgement when I get the machine back.

So they get an F for having faulty motherboards around, and a B+ for the second tech yesterday being honest with me.

I seized the opportunity to give him feedback about my two call to HP yesterday. The first one was obviously an Indian based agent. He used a script, asked me how I was, thanked me for asking back how he was etc. I am patient with non English speaking techs, having worked for companies who use them. I had to spell everything, multiples times, but I was being patient. Honest, I was being as patient as I could be given my level of frustration!

The agent dropped off the line and I called back and got an English speaking tech in Indiana. The call lasted 1/4 of the time, I did not have to spell anything and we corrected the mailing address for the shipment of the machine, which was the purpose of the call. If I had not called back, it would have been shipped to the wrong place. I would really have been pissed then.

I told the agent about my experience, he thanked me, and said I could give feedback on the website. They get an F for that since I cannot find out where to give feedback.

Good customer service matters. I will NEVER buy another HP, because they had faulty mother boards out there for two years, were not proactive about it, and I have been on calls for hours wasting precious retirement time while this problem was getting resolved.

Rant over........

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