Creativity Happens so I Let it

I have been gradually cleaning up the sewing/guest/study room since I retired. Mostly I have tried to set it up so I can sew there and not take over the kitchen and living room with my projects. For about two weeks I have been sewing in there but yesterday I HAD to move out to move out to the kitchen table and island. I was at a point in the project where I was diverging and auditioning fabrics. I needed the space and the sun light. I threw fabrics out on the counter and for about an hour lay one next to another. I finally narrowed down the fabrics and put the others away. There are times when I cannot be confined to my small sewing room and it would definitely squelch my creativity.

I am back in the sewing room now but I just needed that time and space to create. I also leave projects out on the same kitchen counter when they are nearly done, to see if I like them. I casually glance at them and rearrange, or I get comfortable with how they look and then complete the project. I need the space to leave them out to finish the creation, and it needs to be a space that I pass frequently.

I think my sewing room is too dark and too contained. I dream of my ideal living room which would have a corner where I could leave things out and not clutter the shared living space. My creativity corner.

BTW what I leave out is not clutter but creativity.


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Since you asked- my retirement so far

Many people have asked me "How is retirement?" and I to their question i ask "What is not to like about this?"

I reflected on my walk today about how it is going. I have re-joined the YMCA and am going to yoga at least three times a week. Every other day I lift weights and every day I do some cardio, so I am taking care of myself in the exercise arena.

I have a few regular groups that I attend, knitting, quilting, beading and a women's group so I am taking care of myself in the social arena.

I have read at least 15 books which is a huge increase. I often walk to the library to read the daily newspaper.

I am over halfway scanning our 80 boxes of 35MM slides and syncing them to my iPad.

We only eat out once a month so I am cooking lots of healthy food, and not so healthy food, but good anyway, e.g. Cornmeal biscotti.

My sewing machine has been very active, and my sewing room has about 5 current projects laid out.

I have some great trips planned, Brooklyn this weekend to spend Easter with Bee, England to meet two great nieces in May, Nebraska in June for Uncle Chuck's memorial service, General Assembly in Charlotte in June and two weeks on Star in July. Most of these I might have done anyway, but it feels like I can do them since I am retired.

Mostly, I am more relaxed, am taking better care of myself, and I am really happy. I am just a wee bit anxious about not making money.

There are down sides. I miss the people at Intuit. I miss the company and the people there. That is about it.

I am re-inventing myself and what my answer is to "What do you do?"

I am getting trained to be a tutor for WATCH in Waltham and am narrowing down other places to put my energy.

How would I be able to work with all these trips and all these groups?

Life is very Good to me!


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You can do anything you want - for me the wheel

Fortunately both of my parent gave me this message. "Sally, you can do anything you want".

I actually believed that I could beat my brothers at tennis, until they grew to a height where their serves were too powerful.

Yesterday in yoga, I was trying to do the wheel. The instructor helped me and I could not do it, yesterday that is. At that moment in time I realized that eventually, I will be able to do it. Two years ago I could not do, shoulder stand, or dancer or crow. Today I can do all of those. This realization was different though. I actually believe I can do it eventually rather than just saying it but not really believing it.

I should have prefaced this with, things I want to do. I don't really want to be a lawyer or rocket scientist, but if I did want to I believe I could.

Think about the messages that we send ourselves. If we say, privately to ourselves that we cannot, then we don't have a chance.

I will do the wheel regularly some day!
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Patriots Day in Lexington

This is my favorite time of year in Lexington as the Minutemen start appearing, and the town spruces itself up for the many visitors. However, it always reminds me why I am a pacifist.

Our church is perched just off the green where the battle takes place early Monday morning. Watching it always makes me sad though, to watch men (they mostly are) shoot each other at such short range. We have such strong opinions about events and our beliefs. The Redcoats marched through the night or early morning to hold on/protect what they thought was theirs and to enforce orders from their country. I think about our Civil War where brothers shot brothers, and then in Libya where that is still happening.

I could never serve in an armed force where I would have to use a gun against another individual. I cannot even watch this in a movie. How do they do it?

Will there ever be an end to Wars? Are our beliefs so strong that we can not sort them out without bearing arms?

Nevertheless I will be there Monday morning at 4:30 am to watch the re-enactment, and to party for the rest of the day with visitors and community members. This is our BIG day of the year.


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Make the trip Now and floods of happy memories

We went two years ago to a mini reunion in Nevada to visit my deGanahl cousins. There was not a critical mass but after hearing that my Uncle Chuck died on Sunday I am so thankful we made that trip.

Daddy and Uncle Chuck with their wives, Mom and Auntie Pat bought the Lazy EH Ranch in 1954. In fact they closed on the ranch the day I was born, at least that was the story I was told. We grew up with the 5 deGanahl cousins on the ranch until 1965, when we moved away to Vermont and they continued to ranch it until it was sold a few years ago.

Daddy and Uncle Chuck learned how to ranch from other ranchers in Yampa, who called them the "kids". They worked and played together very well, and shared a lot of wonderful personality traits as well.  Chuck's granddaughter said "generous" on her facebook yesterday about him.  She is right on.

From my perspective, they were both quiet, gentle men, who knew what people needed and quietly put that in place to then watch others enjoy.  They never wanted the credit, they just wanted to watch others enjoy.  Two years ago, during our visit, Uncle Chuck heard me remark about the rosemary in front of their house, and the next day he had cut loads of rosemary and put a paper towel around it, in a plastic bag, for me to take home.  Daddy every Christmas would go downstairs, light the tree and then let us run down to see the miracle of Santa Claus.  He would be quietly sitting, grinning in the corner, sipping his coffee, as he watched our eyes light up, and observed us playing with the new toys.  They were both quiet and thoughtful, and unassuming, and very very very bright.

I have been on a 35mm slide scanning binge, so as soon as I heard about Uncle Chuck, I started scanning the pictures from Mama's (Chuck and Mom's mother) 90th birthday celebration, which was the last happy large gathering. The next unhappy large gathering was when Daddy died in 1995.  The picture of Daddy and Uncle Chuck from the 90th is out of focus, but the focus of the pixels is not what matters.
The deGanahl family for those years in Colorado, were our best friends. We lived 7 miles from Yampa, a town of 200 people, down a dirt road on a ranch at 8000 feet in the Rockies. I always say it is as close to heaven as you can get. We played and worked and grew up together. 

Seeing some of the deGanahls cousins, two years ago was lovely.  Unfortunately, the gathering for Uncle Chuck's service soon will be because of his loss, and there will be more of us present for that.

I for one, commit to seeing more of them more for happy occasions, in addition to the inevitable unhappy ones.

Thankfully I am married to a snorer

Ok, most nights I would not relish being married to someone who snores. In fact if we were not at Coniston I might still be poking him to stop. Instead at 4:22 am, after being awake since 3:09 am, I decided to move out to the couch in the living room. Channel 1 and the stars and night sky is just incredible. It feels like I am a part of the sky.

I always love the sun rises here, in fact the first year we owned the house, I got up every morning I could to watch and sometimes photograph the sunrise. The picture on my blog is to remind myself about how beautiful sunrises and sunsets are.

So when I got up to come onto the couch my mind was a flurry of activity. I am in the middle of a few sewing projects that I brought up to Coniston this weekend and I just started a good book. Is it too early to start the day, with my normal cup of God's nectar, AKA java? As a retiree, I don't have to worry about being rested for work. Being tired with a rotary cutter is another story but I will be careful sewing.

I will try again to go to sleep on the couch, but if I cannot sleep, then it does not suck, to watch the stars fade and to see the sun rise over Mount Mansfield, or as my Mom helped us understand growing up (through her reading Buckminster Fuller), the Earth turns to reveal the sun, the sun does not rise. Another Mom memory!

The eternal optimist turns a snoring husband into a good thing. Will I remember this back in Lexington?

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Great idea for a major birthday

My Mom turned 80 last Saturday. A sister-in-law's family celebrated her Mom's 80th the month before and did a really neat present. They also have a huge family so they collected 80 memories and put them in a jar for the Mom to take out one a day and read.

We recreated the idea with a few switches. Mom and Charlie are on a cruise, and since we did not plan ahead, we have to electronically get it to the ship. We did collect 80 and we did get it delivered to her on the boat by her birthday. We did not tell Mom to only read one a day. That would be really hard to do!

I don't know about you, but I don't really NEED anything. This idea to collect memories might be nice for other than major birthdays. What if yearly on a birthday we remembered that person by sharing a memory?

The interesting thing about my siblings was the different memories the older kids had from the younger kids. It is also interesting to see how we remembered the same thing differently. There were a few duplicate memories.

I would have liked to be with Mom on her special day but I was there with her by email and by having sent the memories along. I also had memories of Dad come up during the collection. I wish I had been able to send them to him while he was alive.

In the Unitarian Universalist tradition we have memorial services, and have a part of the service where stories are told about the deceased. I think it is a shame to wait until someone has died to tell the stories and relate memories. May there be a few more major birthdays, that we can send Mom more memories.