A sad Passing yesterday - Mother Moffett

I hear more often of people dying the older I get, but hearing of Bette's death has really struck me deeply. She was such a unique person, and an incredible presence when she walked into the room.

I met Bette when her family bought our house in Brandon, Vermont. They had just moved back from Paris. Mom nicknamed her Mother Moffett. Her son Joe was my boyfriend during most of High School and into my first year of college. He died his senior year of high school, bunting a ball that hit his heart mid heart beat. His death was my first major loss.

After he died, Bette and I did a lot of things together to comfort each other. We saw movies and plays and kept each other company in our grief. When I left home permanently, she was always present when I came back to Brandon and we kept caught up during those times. She became a friend of mine in our shared grief.

Mostly I saw Bette and her husband Hugh, at the tennis courts on our property. Dad and Mom had wonderful parties down at the tennis courts and that group of friends watched over me from teen age years, into adulthood and motherhood. I saw Bette last at a funeral for another one of our family's friend.

I still have letters and cards she wrote to me. They are in the same box as all of the notes and letters that Joe wrote to me. As part of my grief process I am going to go read all of those letters. I tried to find a picture of her today, but could not find one. It is easier in the digital picture stage to store and have pictures. The memories I have of her are in my head and the sound of her voice is clearly stored in my mind.

Bette had one very peculiar behavior. When you talked to her, she never looked you in the eye, she looked at your shoulder and continue talking. It used to freak me out a bit, but later it was charming.

As I watch my parents generation pass away, I face my own mortality. It also allows me some time to revisit who I was in high school, who I was dating her son, and who I was in a small town in Vermont.

So, I imagine Dad and Bette and Hugh and Frank are having a mini-reunion tonight. They are catching each other up and laughing at old stories from the tennis court days. Hugh has his orange broom ball sneakers on, Dad is smoking a cigarette and listening to everyone, Frank is laughing as only Frank did, and Bette is staring at their shoulders and catching them up on Brandon news. If only I believed in Heaven it would be easier, but I do believe in Heaven for them to be able to have this reunion.

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